First one... apparently he's in the emergency room to have something removed from his backside. And whatever it was, it's apparently absurd.
Second one... Mr. Finch is in for some kind of brain surgery. Part of that process involves removing part of your skull (the head cap). Since Mr. Finch is bald, apparently one of the attending staff is trying on his head cap in order to see what it would be like to be bald.
Nice... [img]graemlins/thumbsup.gif[/img] just the thing for my twisted sense of humor