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For anyone reading this and disbelieving it.......I completely understand, tis the story of my life, especially so this year after losing everything I ever held dear, what I found and lost today....well, this year was so shit it's only right and correct that something so small and insignificant to others should be wrenched from my grasp within hours.....Can you read my dissapointment and depression, tis only right again. God decided to test me this year in so many cruel ways (as he has tested many of us)...I'll explain.
History is a massive thing for me, well fuckit, I'll cut to the chase.
Today we visited Melbourne Gaol, saw the deathmasks, took in the atmosphere, felt for the inhumanity of the prisoners and the conditions in which they were imprisoned. Saw the leg irons and manacles and masks and iron hoods within which they were kept to dehumanise them...anyway...
(I fully understand anyone that doesn't believe what comes next...)
I'm in the courtyard of the jail today, standing on the lawn (which wouldn't have been there then) and for some odd reason, smoking my cigarrette, I look down and something catches my eye. Par buried is a piece of extremely rusted steel (I never recognised it as such immediately) and through boredom, curiosity, intrigue, call it what you will I pluck/dig this object from the earth with my hotel key. It is (as far as we could tell) a part of a link of a heavy chain...cut clean through on on one side and cut ninety five percent through on the opposite side (but finally broken by bending (such as if a final hammer and chisel blow was uneccesary, no point in expending energy) We compared it to the links of the chains that were or formed part of the original inmates ball and chains and it appeared to our untrained eyes to be of comparable size and thickness although now very heavily rusted. In years past a blacksmith was called in to cut these chains, no boltcroppers or fancy means back then...this portion was (by 21st century standards) crudely cut.
Well I was on cloud nine, attatch whatever romanticisms you will but who knows, this rusted piece of cut link could very well have bound Ned Kelly...or a thousand others, but it was (at least in our minds) without doubt, a part of that jail history.....I cherished it, looked upon it and romanticised for hours.....I had a "link" to history.
Well fate plays its part. I actually bought a pair of handcuffs in the prison to remind me of my own arrest in Sydney. Suffice to say that I put the handcuffs in my inside pocket to prevent them getting ruined by this piece of rusty steel that I kept removing to gaze upon. In my absolute profound ■■■■■■■ stupidity I left this link in my "dress jacket" side pocket (the same one that my cigarrettes and lighter fell out of to be forever lost...remember Leonis?) Well we're up in Rialto observation tower and my mate Gerry wants once again to look on the link......you know the next bit.......yup....lost....
Twas never meant to leave Australia is the only way I can see it now, but still it's a big pill to swallow. A once in a lifetime never to be repeated find, found and lost within hours, and to tell the story once returned to blighty will scarce ever be believed (as it may well be disbelieved here on this forum)...aaahh well, tis late and again I feel sorry for myself as I seem to do so much this poxy year.
Dunno, just felt the need to expunge once again my poor fortune this year I guess. LOL, if you ever meet me steer well clear for a raincloud will certainly descend upon you. If I was in a marching band no doubt I would be pushing a piano.
Many, infact the majority of you have no comprehension of just how much I've truly lost this year, which is actually everything I ever owned after 40 years bar three photographs which were ruined subsequently....ouch....I need to shut the ■■■■ up and stop feeling sorry for myself. I'm just sick to the back teeth of perpetually losing things. Sorry to bend your ears guys.
I know my cup is half full, sometimes my mind is half empty. Tomorrow's another day, we'll move on and we'll move up....take care.
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