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-   General Conversation Archives (11/2000 - 01/2005) (http://www.ironworksforum.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=28)
-   -   Alcohol Side Effects (Joke) (http://www.ironworksforum.com/forum/showthread.php?t=92811)

Paladin2000 01-26-2005 09:31 AM

<font color=yellow>1. Symptom: Cold and humid feet.</font>
Cause: Glass is being held at incorrect angle.
Cure: Maneuver glass until open end is facing upward.

<font color=yellow>2. Symptom: Warm and humid feet.</font>
Cause: You pissed your pants.
Cure: Dry yourself at nearest restroom.

<font color=yellow>3. Symptom: The wall facing you is full of lights.</font>
Cause: You're lying on the floor.
Cure: Position your body at a 90-degree angle to the floor.

<font color=yellow>4. Symptom: The floor looks blurry.</font>
Cause: You're looking through an empty glass.
Cure: Quickly refill with your favorite beverage.

<font color=yellow>5. Symptom: The floor is moving.</font>
Cause: You're being dragged away.
Cure: At least ask where they're taking you.

<font color=yellow>6. Symptom: You see multiple reflections of your face.</font>
Cause: You're trying to puke in the toilet.
Cure: Stick your finger in your mouth.

<font color=yellow>7. Symptom: You hear echoes every time someone speaks.</font>
Cause: You have your glass on your ear.
Cure: Stop making an ass of yourself.

<font color=yellow>8. Symptom: The room is shaking a lot, everyone is dressed in white and the music is very repetitive.</font>
Cause: You're in an ambulance.
Cure: Don't move. Let the professionals do their job.

<font color=yellow>9. Symptom: Your dad and all your brothers are looking at you funny.</font>
Cause: You're in the wrong house.
Cure: Ask if they can point you to your house.

<font color=yellow>10. Symptom: A huge light is blinding you.</font>
Cause: You woke up in someone's lawn.
Cure: Coffee and a long nap.

Joke taken/borrowed from AskMen.com

[ 01-26-2005, 08:33 AM: Message edited by: Paladin2000 ]

VulcanRider 01-26-2005 12:27 PM

<font color=yellow>Symptom: The "lingerie model" you picked up is wearing underwear larger than yours.</font>
Cause: You have beer goggles.
Cure: Enjoy yourself, then leave quickly or risk having to gnaw your arm off in the morning.

Xen 01-26-2005 12:35 PM

They are good, but it didn't make me laugh.

Blunderbuss 01-26-2005 01:32 PM

lol. The first was the best.

Kakero 01-26-2005 04:33 PM

I wonder if Johnny get all those symptoms. [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]

Sythe 01-26-2005 04:42 PM

LOL Kakero [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]

krunchyfrogg 01-26-2005 05:48 PM

:D Thanks. :D


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