Saddam Hussein was sitting in his office wondering whom to
invade next when his telephone rang.

"Hallo, Mr. Hussein!", a heavily accented voice said. "This is
Paddy down at the Harp Pub in County Sligo, Ireland. I am ringing
to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you!"

"Well, Paddy," Saddam replied, "This is indeed important news!
How big is your army?"

"Right now," said Paddy, after a moment's calculation, "there
is myself, my cousin Sean, my next door neighbor Seamus, and the
entire dart team from the pub. That makes eight!"

Saddam paused. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have one million
men in my army waiting to move on my command."

"Begorra!", said Paddy. "I'll have to ring you back!"

Sure enough, the next day, Paddy called again. "Mr. Hussein,
the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry
equipment!"

"And what equipment would that be, Paddy?" Saddam asked.

"Well, we have two combines, a bulldozer, and Murphy's farm
tractor."

Saddam sighed. "I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 16,000
tanks,and 14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also, I've increased my
army to 1-1/2 million since we last spoke."

"Saints preserve us!" said Paddy. "I'll have to get back to
you."

Sure enough, Paddy rang again the next day.
"Mr. Hussein, the war is still on! We have managed to get
ourselves airborne! We've modified Harrigan's ultra-light
with a couple of shotguns in the cockpit,and four boys from the
Shamrock Pub have joined us as well!"

Saddam was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat.
"I must tell you, Paddy, that I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000
fighter planes. My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided,
surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I've
increased my army to TWO MILLION!"

"Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!", said Paddy, "I'll have to ring
you back."

Sure enough, Paddy called again the next day.
"Top o' the mornin', Mr. Hussein! I am sorry to tell you that
we have had to call off the war."

"I'm sorry to hear that," said Saddam. "Why the sudden change
of heart?"

"Well," said Paddy, "we've all had a long chat over a bunch
of pints, and decided there's no way we can feed two million
prisoners."

God Bless the Irish!

Heh heh. Sounds about right. [img]smile.gif[/img]

This reminds me of the WWII movie, "The Bridge at Remagen" when the Germans were offering a truce to the British Airborne gentlemen and the British replied "sorry, we don't have the facilities to take you all prisoner".

My Irish freind, who will remain anonymous, is like that. Good old Mike I mean *cough**cough*