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S t M o m ' s W o r t
Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to six hours. _____________________________ E m p t y N e s t r o g e n Highly effective suppository that eliminates melancholy by enhancing the memory of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait 'til they moved out. _____________________________ P e p t o b i m b o Liquid silicone for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and improves flirting. ______________________________ D u m e r o l When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low I.Q. causing enjoyment of country western music. ______________________________ F l i p i t o r Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers. ______________________________ A n t i b o y o t i c s When administered to teenage girls, is highly effective in improving grades, freeing up phone lines, and reducing money spent on make-up. ______________________________ M e n i c i l l i n Potent antiboyotic for older women. Increases resistance to such lines as, "You make me want to be a better person ... can we get naked now?" ______________________________ B u y a g r a Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping. Increases potency and duration of spending spree. ______________________________ Extra Strength Buy-One-all When combined with Buyagra, can cause an indiscriminate buying frenzy so severe the victim may even come home with a Donnie Osmond CD or a book by Dr. Laura. ______________________________ J a c k A s s p i r i n Relieves the headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary or phone number. ______________________________ A n t i - t a l k s i d e n t A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers. ______________________________ S e x c e d r i n Bedroom aerosol spray for men. More effective than Excedrin in treating the, "Not now, dear, I have a headache," syndrome. ______________________________ R a g a m e t When administered to a husband, provides the same irritation as ragging on him all weekend, saving the wife the time and trouble of doing it herself. ____________________________ ««« N O T I C E »»» Always consult your family physician before taking new medication. |
Wery interesting hmm.
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<font color="00cc99">lol. Funny John D Harris</font>
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