I have cleaned out the castle keep for Nalia and have agreed to be her stand-in boyfried for econimical purposes. The land has been award to me' but I am waiting for the funeral to start. I am still in the castle. Everyone is waiting for me to do something. I am a fighter so I thought there is suppose to be a funeral. I have not asked Nalia to join me as I like my group. Do I leave the castle and come back later and collect taxes or what. What am I suppose to do here?

go to city and a messenger tracks nalia down. he'll send you to the graveyard district for the funeral. (that's what your major-domo is for, making these arrangements and such...)

sry, didn't read whole question. I'm not sure if you get the Nalia quests if she isn't in your party. but her father's funeral takes place in the city at the graveyard district. never had to make arrangements.