Ironworks Gaming Forum - Received this joke in an email... it's awesome. PG 13 :)

Quote:

I never quite figured out why the sexual urges of men and women
differ so
much. And I never figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I
have
never figured out why men think with their head and women think
with
their heart.
I have never figured out why the sexual desire gene gets thrown
into a
state of turmoil, when it hears the words "I do"
FOR EXAMPLE:
One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well,
the
passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel
like
it, I just want you to hold me." I said "WHAT???!!! What was
that?!"
So she says the words that every husband on the planet dreads to
hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a
woman enough
for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me
for
who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night I went to
sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time
with her.
We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big
unnamed
department store. I walked around with her while she tried on
several
different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one
take so
I told her we'll just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to
compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each
outfit.
We went to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of
diamond earrings.
Let me tell you, she was so excited. She must have thought I was
one
wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me
because she asked for a tennis
bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis. I think I
threw
her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost
nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the
excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I
think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier."
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I
don't
feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a
baffled
"WHAT??!!!" I then said "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this
stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs
as a
man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And
just
when she had this look like she was going to kill me I
added, why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the
things I
buy you?"
Apparently I won't be having sex again until sometime after pigs fly
over a frozen hell.

YEAH!! [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img] :D