Sea Cave Revitalized...
 

Okay...

I went down into the Sea Cave after grabbing Roddybug The Sage (aka "U Da Mahn!") and a few supplies. Please note, these supplies were all taken from the bodies of Mordok's followers repeatedly. Okay, after getting Roddybug some new threads and a new beatstick, we entered the Sea Cave through the Fourth Level of the Undermountain, only to find ourselves confronted with a Huge Water Elemental and a few of those Umberlee Manifestations. Now the Manifestations of the Cruella DeVille of the Deep I was expecting, but not one of her new bullyboys. Luckily, the little lady I was playing (half-orc 40th level cleric) wasn't without a beatstick of her own.

I go down the long abandoned mineshaft a little more only to find myself confronted with ANOTHER Huge Water Elemental. (I am suspecting that Ziroc may create a new subset of Furious Saltwater Elementals just for areas like this one soon.) And after the third one, I decided that I was going to get myself a Hellfire Shotgun on my next trip to The Store. (The Store being the two merchants located on Level Twelve - the regular human merchant to the Cult Of The Dragon and Mephistopheles in the twisted dimension.)

When we got to the midway point (or so it seemed like), another Umberlee Manifestation tried to take us out. As you might have guessed, it failed miserably. (I would like to thank Aribeth for selling her old armor so the dark elves within the Drow City could make "cheap knockoffs" of the original.) After the Death Knight found permanent rest, we entered the only one of the dungeons currently accessible. After all, we want to help these poor beleagured souls find a beautiful afterlife... the old-fashioned way. Giving the gift of smackdown is something that should be cherished by all clerics. And with such an astounding and astute companion such as Roddybug with me, I could not help but wish to donate to others in liberal amounts.

This region, of course, was the Hall Of Dragonkin. The average adventurer would insist the Undermountain has enough scale issues as it stands now, but that is for another tale (or seven, depending on whom is your storyteller). Half-dragon sorcerers abounded here once. No longer, thanks to the Sage's deft staff-wielding. Raga'Veross was a brand new threat to the sanity of all good-looking magisters everywhere - and so Roddybug insisted we take care of the situation with extreme predujice. What I don't understand is that with the arsenal of scrolls I bought for him... why didn't he USE ANY? I mean, we were ambushed by close to five Ancient Red Dragons during the course of this endeavour and yet nothing?

In the end... we both died. It was horrible. The brand new dragon crushed us both like bugs. Next time I drag someone in there with me with more striking power... someone like Jaross, Guss, or Teri'sha.

Re: Sea Cave Revitalized...
 

Oh, Mozenwrathe *shakes head sadly* I don't know how often I've told you about that: magic doesn't solve all ills. Sometimes, just sometimes, you need a friend with a REALLY big stick and a willingness to use it. I enjoy partying up with you, it is always a pleasure, but without doubt you are always at your best lurking at the back and using your spells to wear these guys down, repair damage to the front-line with a lot of Heal and leave the abominable hell of standing toe-to-toe at the line of scrimmage to those who don't even know how to back-down, nor how to use magic with any seriousness. Now I have a reputation for not being very good with magic, frankly it is an unearned one - the truth is that I'm actually useless with it and shouldn't be allowed near a blank scroll, let alone one with writing. Whereas for sheer, bludgeoning, chaotic, berserker-style savagery I'm up there with the best. It is a well-known fact* that there's not a lot out there that can stand up to Ung, the Fast and Furious Kobold of Doom.

So next time you want to play in the Dragonkin, get a party together, a couple of kegs of beer, the odd leg of lamb and we'll go have a BBQ special.



*according to the book of Ung. Strictly speaking this states:
"The heroic Ung doesn't know the meaning of fear and will tackle dragons, Patrolling Guardians, Squch, and anything else that moves, sooner than wash his loincloth**. This occasionally leads to mis-understandings which are always settled with the blunt end of a mace, which luckily for Ung can be either end. It is not that Ung is uncommonly brave, but simply that the word 'Fear' is not in his dictionary, nor in fact, any word after 'Erudite'***, which is entirely due to the continuing lack of toilet-paper in EFU resulting in a 'when needs must' attitude regarding the nice, soft paper upon which it is printed."

**There are entire legends built upon the exploits of this particular loincloth, which is a hero in it's own right.

***Note also that Ung doesn't know the meaning of 'Erudite' either, since all the words constituting the definition of it are also missing, for the reason previously outlined.

Re: Sea Cave Revitalized...
 

Ung! Ung! All praise Unglaublich Verwustung, leader of the small-folk, bane of the tall-folk, most beneviolent benefiber, and dementor of the faith. Your generosity is without inhibition, oh stinky loincloth one.

In what could only be decried as an ungcanny lapse of judgment were Ung not an exalted divinely immoral being, Ung showed the aristocratic ogliophrenia characteristic of superior inbreeding when he donated both Twinkle and Icingdeath so I could most arrogantly build Drizzt Do'Urden in Undermountain.

After an intense two day training seminar (F5, Ra7, WM28) Drizzt ventured into the Hall Of Dragonkin eschewing henchmen, after all, what is Icingdeath if not a dragon killer? Within minutes of our hero's entry, Ancient Red dragons were being split like fiery putrid piñatas. One after another enraged serpents and half-dragon sorcerers violently opposed valiant Drizzt's well meant redecorating efforts; alas, not everyone can appreciate the aesthetic value of entrail wainscoting.

Anon, the interior design dispute was resolved when none but Drizzt and Raga'Veross stood in the Hall. Fie, fie! The eldritch blade well drenched in vile wyrmblood proved hardly a nuisance to Raga'Veross, Regent of Rankor. Harkening tales told, the intrepid Ranger considered one credible claim of this creature's vulnerability... bearing scars and loot to prop up his story, a rogue elf bragged that he, in the unglikely company of a belligerent loincloth (and it's diminutive host), had survived the Hall by deducing that, contrary to common counsel, the beast bears a certain susceptibility to those practiced in the ars arcanum. To wit: in reinforcing resistance to select magics, the ophidian oaf has left itself open to other evocations.

Whipping out his drow trinket, Drizzt flashed it at the bellowing brute and released the magic within; a fiery roundure ringed the rabid rat-snake, then detonated a hellacious fulmination of searing force which knocked the dazed demon-spawn to the floor. Surely clouds of confusion were sundered as sharp streaks of steely strife slid beneath a scaly hide and bit into soft, turgid flesh. Roaring with rage, the bellicose behemoth lunged at the audacious adventurer, malevolent eyes blackened with primal hatred. Festooned in the blinding baubles of pain and fury, the hapless hulk scarcely registered the second blazing ball of whoop-ass as it once more wrought destruction upon the wretched wyrm.

It wasn't long ere the corpse of the vapid viper lay oozing offal all over our intrepid conqueror's trollskin boots; perhaps, he mused, he was imprudent to slay the lunatic rakshasa mageling which tried to barter mercy for something it called "naugahyde".

Re: Sea Cave Revitalized...
 

What happened to slash and smash.

Did it suddenly go out out of fashion?

Re: Sea Cave Revitalized...
 

Solo is sooooo lvl 3.....Party is way of the future!

Re: Sea Cave Revitalized...
 

Well, the quest down in Dragonkin is developing, get xp for agreeing to help, get xp for killing lots of dragons but failing to find anything useful - intrigued to find out what we get for successfully doing this one!

Sent a weenie whip-master in, who was helped by a remarkably inspired Cookie, Teri teleported in, courtesy of Halaster, and the intriguing use of clothes as a weapon (go Vixen Robes). Really, if I don't have a dragon-slayer I should still only do this in a party. You'd have thought I'd learn by now. D'oh.

Looking good, boys and girls. More reports from our intrepid adventurers as they go on.

Re: Sea Cave Revitalized...
 

I noticed the update yesterday and sent a rogue down to investigate; he did well up until the discovery that Raga'Veross considers daggers nice, but not quite as effective as a good +10 Back Scratcher of Relief. Rather sheepishly resorting to wardrobe munitions, our ersatz hero was a bit confused, but uplifted when the last group of half-dragon wizards and clerics joined in his, eh... defense, such as it was. Now if only I could find Bigby's Bermuda Shorts, Tasha's Hideous Trousers, or even Gedlee's Electric Lederhosen.

Re: Sea Cave Revitalized...
 

Forgot to mention the Elementals conveniently dying as I walked closer to them, saved some arm-power :-)

Re: Sea Cave Revitalized...
 

Still tweaking the Dragons.. and the one live now--he just needs a teensie bit of tweaking. :)

Re: Sea Cave Revitalized...
 

Okay, now that we have this really attractive damsel literally requesting for us to throw ourselves into the maws of giant lizards in the hopes we will bite the beasts harder than we chomp into them, I do have a few questions:

1) What shall happen to all their scaly (and named) brethren? I do remember creating numerous threads (much to the amusement and scholarly advantage of others) about the winged magical gila monsters of doom previously. Shall they also be receiving upgrades in the treasures they leave behind? Will more than one be taking the "saurosteroids" that Raga and his dark-scaled have been? Shall that one lost little white dragon in the midst of the Undead Isle be renamed at long last? Inquiring minds want to know!

2) Shall new theme music be required for these champions of chaos and sinister serpents of scaly superiority? Will Ice Cube's "Wicked" or "As Torches Rise" by Turisas echo throughout the halls?

3) Will the eternal question of "can a Lawful Evil fighter/mage/thief backhand a member of the Moonstars into a paladin and knock out the paladin" finally be answered? (MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!)

4) Rolf, being the ever adventuring cook that he is, has been seen in the bowels of the Undermountain looking for mushrooms. Do we fear the worst and expect him to demand ingrediants from the lairs of the legendary wyrms next?

5) Will Ung EVER wash that Loincloth Of Puissance +infinity of his? (Like really, it's beginning to smell, and running through waterfalls isn't helping. It was quite effective creating an underwater cloud of choking against the Sauhagin actually...)

6) With Ung's treacherous kobold brethren make a reappearance and strike at the intrepid adventurers in new and fearless fashions? (As well, will THEY have washed their loincloths? Because that Gust of Wind spell is looking more and more appealing by the minute.)

7) Shall the OTHER legendary kobold make his first official appearance within the Undermountain at long last? That's right, shall we hear Deekin's sweet dulcet tones careening through the tavern before we are sent down into the cavernous depths?

8) Any possibility of a "sink crevice" within the Sea Cave to take us to new unknown depths and other such undersea menaces? (Such as a brand new deep water dragon?)