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-   -   A Rough Classification of Movies (http://www.ironworksforum.com/forum/showthread.php?t=92103)

Attalus 10-31-2004 06:19 PM

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Dan Jenkins sums up the types of movies.

Romantic Movies -
Edward doesn't see how he can divorce his wife as long as she's in that wheelchair. Rachael doesn't see how she can divorce her husband as long as he's off at war. Oh, well, time to [make love] again.

Cop Movies -
"Make my day, Carlos, so I can hasta la vista your dope-crazed ass."

Adventure Movies -
"Let me get this straight. We have twelve hours to get the diamonds out of the temple, or the Nazi mummies will stick forks in our eyes?"

English Movies -
They talked for three days and the girl never fell off the cliff.

Subtitle Movies -
They smoked a lot, nobody could figure out how to turn off the windshield wipers, and two or three people caught trains.

Western Movies -
"A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do, Clarissa. Now put the coffee on while I go out and kill these outlaws that forgot to shave today."

Science Fiction Movies -
"It doesn't seem possible that they can look, act and talk like humans when only three days ago they were in boxes of Cream of Wheat. How can this be, Professor?"

Safari Movies -
"He says he saw a white man come through here six weeks ago, but he went off to Magonga Goola with Ava Gardner."

Medical Movies -
"I'm afraid that the pain will slowly consume his whole body, but he probably won't go blind until there's nobody left in the audience."

Historical Movies -
That moat doesn't seem to do much good.

War Movies -
"No sir, I've never landed a B-17 before - I'm just a homespun tailgunner from Pocatella, Idaho."

Horror Movies -
"Is that you, Debbie?"

Variol (Farseer) Elmwood 10-31-2004 06:24 PM

That's very insightful?

Hivetyrant 10-31-2004 06:26 PM

lol, those are hilarious Attalus [img]graemlins/thumbsup.gif[/img]
I loved this one:
Quote:

Adventure Movies -
"Let me get this straight. We have twelve hours to get the diamonds out of the temple, or the Nazi mummies will stick forks in our eyes?"

Kakero 10-31-2004 07:08 PM

I can imagine the horror movie one. " is that you debbie? " and suddenly this stupid loud sudden stop music play.

Arvon 10-31-2004 07:39 PM

It seems you forgot the Japanese monster movie where the monster eats all of Las Vagus, but spits out Elvis.

aleph_null1 10-31-2004 09:26 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Attalus:
Subtitle Movies -
They smoked a lot, nobody could figure out how to turn off the windshield wipers, and two or three people caught trains.

Too perfect, Attalus; almost every movie I own is like this :D

Intrepid 11-01-2004 05:23 AM

the subtitled movie one is great!
allways smoking and catching trains! :D
great

Xen 11-01-2004 05:28 AM

ROFL! Those were great Attie! :D

Callum 11-01-2004 05:45 AM

Heh... I like ;)

Beaumanoir 11-01-2004 01:11 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Attalus:

War Movies -
"No sir, I've never landed a B-17 before - I'm just a homespun tailgunner from Pocatella, Idaho."

[img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]

Amazing :D


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