and everyone else on the board. I also want to take responsibility for the controversy that has been stirred up. Lady Rae was doing a favor for me and as such I am at the root of the issue, and at the root of this controversy. If there is to be any additional blame levied at anyone, I wish it would be levied at me. I do not intend to try to defend myself, because the bottom line is that people have been angered, hurt, and offended, and that in itself renders my actions undefensible. I would like to say that all of my actions have been motivated by good intentions. I am a compassionate and caring person, and I know at least some of you view me the same way because you have told me as much personally. I would never do anything intentional to hurt anyone on this board, I would much rather be hurt myself.There are, however, three points that I would like to make that could perhaps in the future stop this kind of thing from happening again.

First, I would, if I became offended or angered by someone's post, go to that person privately by e-mail (I believe most of us have e-mail addresses posted) and in a non-confrontational manner say, "I believe I may have misunderstood your post. Could you please clarify or explain to me what your point is?" I think that could stave off controversary and hurt feelings. It is true that not being able to see people has definite disadvantages. You cannot evaluate a person's tone of voice or demeanor when they say something.

Second, I have found some topics to be of absolutely no interest to me or even offensive. If after reading the first few posts, if I am offended, I can chose to leave that post and read no more. This is a free and open board and no one forces us to read anything. There are some topics that I steer clear of--politics for example. But I do not expect peole to not talk about these things. I can police myself on what I am comfortable reading or not.

Third, with the exception of a few very close friends I have made here, none of you know anything about me. And, by the same token, I really know nothing about the majority of you. Therefore, I do not feel that I am qualified to make a moral judgement about anyone on the board--I lack enough information to do so. I do not know what kind of lives you live, your work situation, family, home, personal relationship--I know none of that. I hear and see things that go against my own moral code, however, I do not know that person or their circumstances and therefore, do not feel that I can make that call. When I was a little girl, I would come home from school and complain to my mother about the "bad kids." You know, the ones who never minded the teacher, who disrupted class, always getting into trouble. My mother would say to me, "Well, you never know what that child has had to go through from the time they left school until they get back the next morning." Those words have stayed with me all my life. I strive daily to not be critical or judgemental because until I have "walked a mile" in that person's shoes, I do not know.

Again, my sincerest and heart-felt apologies to everyone. I hope that you all will graciously accept itmy apology.

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Reeka--The Hand of Death O_H_F
Lady in Waiting (found what I was waiting for)
Official Party Planner and Events Coordinator of the Moon's Hope Inn
Proud Member of the Ladies Guild
GMDLM

http://publish.hometown.aol.com/tobb...ages/reeka.jpg

lurker responds...
"Well said!" http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/smile.gif

Well Reeka, I don´t know whats been going on but I consider you as my friend and if you feel that you have erred, well, who is perfect. I´m far from it so in my mind you´re forgiven cause you seem to feel that you neede to say this and I don´t know if it is due for an apology or not.. but non the less.
People that ask for forgivness are most often worth it, so if my rambling here is in the dark.. I´ll throw in a hug to you so you kno I mean this in a good and friendly way Reeka!!!

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http://wolfgir.najk.net/name.gif
WOLF WINS EVERY FIGHT BUT ONE, AND IN THAT ONE, HE DIES

Apology accepted, http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/smile.gif though I have no idea why you're apologizing, Reeka http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/smile.gif or why you feel responsible for all this (as I mentioned to you in my email).

I am just completely, totally, absolutely bewildered as to how all this happened all of a sudden. LadyRae posts that she was unhappy about the content of the Testosterone thread. I thought we all did a good job of discussing this in a rational and reasonable manner, and <font color="green">RESOLVED</font> it. Then this. http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/frown.gif

I hope NOBODY leaves. Leave for a few days if you must, and think things through. To leave for something that has been blown WAY out of proportion is just ridiculous. We'd love to have you back. http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/smile.gif

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http://www.angelfire.com/anime2/memnoch/genwalk.gif http://www.angelfire.com/anime2/memnoch/memname.GIF

[This message has been edited by Memnoch (edited 05-03-2001).]

Thanks, Wolfie, really appreciate it.

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Reeka--The Hand of Death O_H_F
Lady in Waiting (found what I was waiting for)
Official Party Planner and Events Coordinator of the Moon's Hope Inn
Proud Member of the Ladies Guild
GMDLM

http://publish.hometown.aol.com/tobb...ages/reeka.jpg

I am staying out of this matter (Mr. Neutrality here), but I just wanted to say Hi to Reeka and let her know that she is missed. http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/frown.gif

BK

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http://publish.hometown.aol.com/tobb...emonknight.gif
The Black Storm Cloud of the Night
Consort to a Queen
Champion of Truth, Justice and Cloudy's Way
Captain of the Knights of the Golden Dragons
Heart, Mind, and Soul
Offical Wizard and Warrior Questioner

I agree with all the responses to Reeka's post http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/smile.gif Come in outa the cold, Reeka! LadyRae, too, if she's lurking http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/smile.gif

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Smile! Life is too short for bitching! http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...s/EEhearts.gif

Fljotsdale

Reeka-

Since I have spent several days posting my own version (in various threads) of the very issues you make in your First and Second points, I obviously agree with them.

As for the rest- Well, as they say, "live and learn". If this rather large mountain from a molehill may now be let to rest, we can all get on with our Ironworks affairs in more civil and happy tones. Feel free to do the same. I suspect you will find that even those who disagreed with you on one thing or another will be gracious in their behavior. That is the Hallmark of Ziroc's entire Website. And one reason that I am sticking around.

Cloudbringer

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http://publish.hometown.aol.com/tobb...s/bestow~1.jpg Raindancer of the Laughing Hyenas Clan
Storm-Queen
StormCloud of the Black Knight
Heart Mind Soul Forever


[This message has been edited by Cloudbringer (edited 05-03-2001).]