I cleared DeArnise keep, accepted it as my stringhold, dismissed minsc (sent him to CC) and took Nalia. It's been 8 days and I still have not met any messangers about Nalia's father's funeral. DO I need to wait more or is it just not goign to happen?

I still think you are going to half to wait a little longer. I think I first meet the so called groom when I was in the cemetary. Try going there to see if the wedding party is there.

I did this quest a short time ago, and I'm pretty sure it took less than 10 days for the messenger to arrive. I slept at the inn at the promenade, and the messenger appeared after I left the inn, not while I was in it. So sleep for 10 days, then leave the inn and you should meet the messenger. If not, there may be a bug. No biggie, the quest is worth little and is lame. Just ditch that foolish Nalia ASAP.

she's with my party only long enough to pay me for clearing the keep, then I tell her to hit the pavement.