<font color=lime>My dad, a psychologist, told me this when I was a young kid, and I just ran across it surfing the web. It is a great analogy for someone who has, anxiety, depression, and other personality disorders.
And is an inspirational read for everyone else.
I love it.</font>

<font color=FF9900>
A philosophy professor stood before her class and had some items in front of her. When the class began, silently she picked up a large empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks. She then asked the students if the jar was full? They agreed that it was. So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. She shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the rocks. She then asked the students again if the jar was full. They again agreed it was.

The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. Now, said the professor, I want you to recognize that this is your life. The rocks are the important things - your family, your partner, your health, your children - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house, your car. The sand is everything else. The small stuff. If you put the sand into the jar first, there is no room for the pebbles or the rocks. The same goes for your life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical check-ups. Take your partner out dancing. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal. Take care of the rocks first - the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.
</font>

<font color=lime>I hope you like it. :D
</font>

I like it [img]smile.gif[/img] . It's hard not to worry about small stuff that is unimportant in the grand scheme of things but when you don't, you are usually much happier! Not much help for people who don't, or feel they don't, have any rocks though! ;)

And just because it's the type of gal I am, thought I'd just point out that, while cute and useful for 'normal people', this would be absolutely no help at all for someone with a real personality disorder. They are extremely intractable and almost impossible to change even with hardcore therapy. A jar full of rocks and sand isn't going to do anything [img]tongue.gif[/img] ;)

Sand comes from rocks [img]tongue.gif[/img]

Aelia Jusa, they just need the rest of the exercise. You see, you take that jar, filled with rocks, pebbles, and sand, and then you pour in beer. There will still be places for the beer to go, highlighting the fact that there's always time for a beer in your life [img]graemlins/cheers.gif[/img]

Okay, so that was a weak defense. But I have heard that one extended with the beer conclusion :D

Nice post, LK... and a welcome refresher.

Oh brilliant! [img]graemlins/thumbsup.gif[/img] I've heard of hot-tub therapy, but beer therapy... is it too late to change my PhD topic? :D

LOL! Don't like beer (ack don't throw things!) but the hot tub thing...yah, that sounds good! :D

<font color=lime>Personality disorders are very difficult to treat, and takes years, your right. But it seems to me that this might be a tool a therapist could use during the course of therapy, to help the client visualise what may be happening in there thoughts, emotions, what ever the case may be. These people are usually extremely intravert, and defensive, which makes them often blind to logical rationale.
Kinda like the "Dr. Phil syndrom". He became very famous by telling people the obvious. Most people are just blind to it.

BTW. Just to be straight-up, I am not a professional in this field. I will be someday at some level, but not yet.
I speak confidently becouse of my upbringing, and "training" from my dad. Also alot of reading and some "natural" logic in human behavior.
And the biggest reason, I am married to a "patient".

You're in college for this, right? I do respect your knowledge on this, and know very well you have real education, and I dont. For whatever its worth. [img]smile.gif[/img]

</font>

[ 09-16-2004, 06:29 PM: Message edited by: LordKathen ]

Heard it before and it's alays a good reminder... [img]smile.gif[/img]

Never heard it before, but I like it.

The trick is to get certain people to remember the example when they get all obsessive and upset.

Thatas great. Really puts lifes little things into perspective.