PENSACOLA, FL—Calling his flamboyant air and effeminate mannerisms "a bit forced," friends of recently out-of-the-closet homosexual Mark Glynn, 23, say he's overdoing it.


Above: Glynn rollerblades in one of his new ensembles.
"When Mark first told us he was gay, everybody was totally cool with it," longtime friend Rich Eddy said. "We figured he'd basically be the same old Mark, except he'd be dating guys. Boy, were we wrong."

Though Glynn's friends expected him to become comfortable and open with his sexuality, they did not expect him to go to such great lengths to proclaim his preference for men at every conceivable turn.

"We just figured he'd start saying stuff to us at bars like, 'Check out that cute guy's butt,'" Eddy said. "But he takes pains to telegraph his gayness 24 hours a day. Last night, a bunch of us were talking about what's going on with Bush and Iraq, when, out of nowhere, he says, 'You know what Bush needs? A good a**-f***ing [edited upon suggestion]. That'd relax him.' It's like, 'Okay, Mark, we get it already—you're gay.'"

Continued Eddy: "It's like he's scared that if he doesn't wear hot pants and say 'You go, girl!' a lot, somebody might think he's straight."

Lydia Richter, another longtime friend of Glynn's, has also noticed the change.

"We can't have a conversation without him mentioning some aspect of gay culture," Richter said. "No matter what it is—art, comedy, movies, restaurants, philosophy—he goes off on how it affects him as a gay man. Mark, we've accepted that you like the dick, so just shut up and be gay already."

Even Andrew Storch, a gay coworker of Glynn's who recently went on several dates with him, said Glynn is "laying on the gay a little heavy."

"After Mark came out, he said he'd been attracted to me for a long time," Storch said. "We went out a few times, but he constantly acted like he had something to prove. Everywhere he went, he was mincing around like RuPaul at Wigstock. And, Lord, you should have seen the shoes he was wearing on our second date. I realize he's excited about being out of the closet, but you don't have to make up for those lost years of gayness all at once."

Added Storch: "I hope I wasn't like that when I came out."

Of all the aspects of Glynn's life, friends say his wardrobe has undergone the most drastic change. Instead of wearing khakis and understated dress shirts, Glynn now opts for brightly patterned sleeveless T-shirts and tight short-shorts.

"Two weeks after he came out, he showed up at a party in little pink biker shorts and an open button-down shirt with nothing on underneath," Eddy said. "This is a guy who once said wearing blue jeans made him feel 'weird.' Now, he says he's saving up to buy a whole leather get-up with harnesses and metal studs. I don't know where he got the idea that real gay people actually wear that stuff in their daily lives."

Glynn has adopted a number of other stereotypically gay affectations, including finger-snapping, a "swishy" walk, and calling everyone "sweetie" or "girlfriend."

"I guess he's picking it up from some of the gay guys he meets when he goes out, but it's just not him," Storch said. "A few times, I've actually caught him doing the limp-wrist thing. All that's missing is the lisp."

Even Glynn's drinking habits have taken on a gay tone.

"Mark used to be a single-malt scotch drinker," Eddy said. "Now it's Cosmos or Mai Tais. I didn't realize that liking men altered your taste buds."

According to Dirk Yunger, author of You're Here, You're Queer, Get Used To It: The New Millennium Guide To Coming Out Of The Closet, it is common for "late bloomers" like Glynn to over-embrace homosexuality.

"Mark has been hiding his true sexuality for so long, he can't help but want to shout it out to the world," Yunger said. "His friends should give him time to figure out how his newfound sexual openness will fit into his larger persona. Eventually, he will level out and become more like the Mark they used to know. In the meantime, his friends will have to endure a lot of annoying conversations about 14-inch dildos and what he'd like to do to Rupert Everett. Christ, I don't envy them."

[ 10-10-2002, 06:01 PM: Message edited by: Timber Loftis ]

I can handle someone being gay, but going WAAAAY over the top like that......
Thats just plain nasty! :(

especially if it's not them :(

Interesting. Kind of like the opposite of a hetrosexual homophobic person.

Both seem insecure.

Nothing wrong with a totally straight male thinking another man is attractive, or feeling comfortable with ones 'feminine side'; and there's nothing wrong with a gay male thinking a woman is attractive or being comfortable with ones 'inner hetromale'.

It's about balance, love of self, and acceptance of complexity. Rather than controlling or acting on every urge or inclination. That's my take on it.

I really have to quit reading this stuff at lunchtime... my boss is wondering why I'm laying on the keyboard laughing like a fool... that was a hoot, Timber, thanks.

Oh, Yorick, quit being coy and go ahead and out yourself. :D

Let's just hope G. Bush doesn't read this thread. :D

The Onion is great [img]smile.gif[/img]

American People Shrug, Line Up For Fingerprinting
WASHINGTON, DC—Assuming that there must be a good reason for the order, U.S. citizens lined up at elementary schools and community centers across the nation Monday for government-mandated fingerprinting. "I'm not exactly sure what this is all about," said Ft. Smith, AR, resident Meredith Lovell while waiting in line. "But given all the crazy stuff that's going on these days, I'm sure the government has a very good reason." Said Amos Hawkins, a Rockford, IL, delivery driver: "I guess this is another thing they have to do to ensure our freedom."

[ 10-10-2002, 04:11 PM: Message edited by: Rokenn ]

LOL... If a person ends up staying in a state like that for at least a year, THEN i'd consider them crazy [img]tongue.gif[/img] Sheesh! If everyone else mellows out about somehting like that, why must the person always make it dramatic? [img]tongue.gif[/img]

[img]graemlins/saywhat.gif[/img] Riiiiiggggghhhhhhhttttttt............. Um, whatever....... as long as he keeps his sword swallower act out of my face, he'll do just fine.

<font color="lightblue">Overdoes it indeed [img]graemlins/saywhat.gif[/img] </font>

Thats HILARIOUS! And so totally believable! I can just hear myself saying those things if one of my friends "came out of the closet"...Whats your source Timber?

I used to go to that sight all the time... then I just forgot about it. :D

Yep - The Onion. All the news that fits.

Doesn't sound like you people have worked at too many call centres in Sydney. Often, that's not OTT, it's normal. You get used to it and almost don't notice it after a while.

Someone told me about this place just a few days ago. It's an OK site, but I have seen some funnier stuff.

this reminds me of a friend i had once, he came out of the closet (we all knew he would!) and all of a sudden he was listening to "it's raining men" when driving the loop in town. thank goodness he calmed down. i know i couldn't have been that irritating when i came out as a bisexual. course i was younger, and not nearly as repressed as i probably should have been....oh well....

Interesting that you should assume that. It says a lot about repressive attitudes towards men. My point was precisely that a man should be able to appreciate another males good looks without their sexuality being called into question. A man should be able to express their feminine side without them feeling they are perhaps 'a woman trapped in a mans body' because of societies repressive attitudes.

It's fine for women. Women can sleep in the same bed and it's not construed as homosexual. Women can get all huggy, without needing the "three pats on the back" hug.(I'm...Not...gay...) Women can declare that another woman looks beautiful. Women can wear suits, cut their hair like a man, and pursue traditional male pursuits/hobbys without their sexual preference or gender identity being called into question.

Why not men?

I only barely express some of my confidence and security in who I am as a hetrosexual male, and the joke about 'coming out' is thrown around.

Yes, yes I'll 'lighten up' if it was only a joke, but why should it be a joke? For some, coming out is a very painful event so it's something to treated with care, not used derogatorily in jest. ;)

Anyway have a good night/day. [img]smile.gif[/img]

[ 10-11-2002, 01:36 AM: Message edited by: Yorick ]

Someone told me about this place just a few days ago. It's an OK site, but I have seen some funnier stuff.</font>[/QUOTE]It's not just a site. It's a free newspaper circulated in Chicago. The paper itself has way more than the site. Yep, there's funnier stuff, but not of this ilk (i.e. newspaper spoof).

Yorick, it was only merely simply solely a joke. That's what the :D was for. I absotively posolutely agree with everything you said. And I hope, after living with a gay male for years and being close friends with many, I am not ever again construed as close-minded on this topic. ;)

And, on that note, there are some intrinsic truths I see in the world:
1. Women being with women in an "intimate" friend way is seen as cooler than men doing the same because, as a general rule, both men and women realize the female body looks much better. True, there are some ripped guys out there, but most of us just have that stomach pouch - which on women doesn't look quite so bad.
2. Male or female, you must admit Pierce Brosnan is rather lickable. :D
3. Gay bars in the States play the *best* dance music of any bars in the States.

Brad Pitt is by far THE most attractive person EVER!!!
He is Awesome in Fight Club, one of my favorite movies ever! (along with Monty python and the Holy Grail and Princess Mononoke)

I can say this because I am secure in my manhood.

You know, I haggled between Brad and Pierce when posting my reply. And yes, he looked like a god in Fight Club.

I think with (straight) men it's a "wish I looked like that" thing.

I'd be telling Glynn to keep it to himself if he wanted to keep my company.

Interesting topic...glad Timber edited out the MA-rated stuff, we do have young kids on this board. Thanks, mate. [img]graemlins/thumbsup.gif[/img]

Just some random thoughts: at the end of the day, people are people - some guys like girls, some guys like guys. Some girls like guys, some girls like girls.

Situation 1. If you're a guy and a girl is attracted to you, but you not to her, what do you do? Let her know you're not interested, right? (Let's assume you're not one of those losers who lead people on. :D )

Situation 2. If you're a guy and a guy is attracted to you but you not to him, what do you do? Let him know you're not interested, right?

Is there any reason to be ruder in Situation 2 than in Situation 2? I wouldn't have thought so - at the end of the day you're trying to achieve an outcome - sorry, I don't like you - that should be quite simple to communicate. Even simpler if he's DC and you're AC, because then you don't even need to make up an excuse. :D

As for being friends with gay people, I have lots of gay friends, one or two who have professed attraction in the past and I've told them I don't swing that way (nicely). I also have lots of female friends who have previously professed attraction and I've told them I'm not interested (nicely), and our friendship has sustained, so why should the fact that someone is gay be any different?

Just 2c from a simple person who thinks that we tend to complicate this stuff WAY too much with our own insecurities. ;)

I'm a simple person at the end of the day...I think we complicate life too much with this sort of stuff.

Edit: one more thing - gay people are the coolest people to party with, never a dull moment. :D

[ 10-11-2002, 11:11 AM: Message edited by: Memnoch ]

You know, Memnoch, I have to agree with everything you said - but also point out that the floppy-belt-thing feller in your sig looks absolutely fagulous! :D :D :D

[ 10-11-2002, 11:15 AM: Message edited by: Timber Loftis ]

Ta, girlfriend! :D

i'm sorry but i think the jerry ryan (played 7 of 9 in voyager, and a teacher in boston public) is the hottest person, in show biz anyway. i'm sorry but i just don;t think men can be "sexy." maybe i'm just weird. some can have an air about them that makes them....tempting, lickable is a good word, but none make me drool. and yes my hubby knows how i feel.

as far as acceptance goes it depends on who and where you're trying to be accepted. there are problems even in my hometown with women coming out. such is life. not everyone lives and let's live.

That's a belt? here I'd thought it was a sort of... um... glove-thingy. Or thingy-glove. Or something...

I think it's a sash, right Memsypie? ;) Such a lovely sash it is, too [img]tongue.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/showoff.gif[/img]

I think it's a sash, right Memsypie? ;) Such a lovely sash it is, too [img]tongue.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/showoff.gif[/img] </font>[/QUOTE]Looks like a really 'loose' banana! [img]smile.gif[/img] j/k Mem!! :D

<font color="lightblue">I`ll never look at that signiture the same way again [img]graemlins/uhoh1.gif[/img] </font>

I've always thought of you as being simple Memnoch, but on this occasion I think you've got to the bottom of it.

:D

Are you joining the Fellowship on our NWN travels tonight?

Oh, and Donut old son, I can't remember what the score in the 2nd Test vs Pakistan is, can you remind me what it is? I know you're up to date in the cricket and all... :D

Are you joining the Fellowship on our NWN travels tonight?

Oh, and Donut old son, I can't remember what the score in the 2nd Test vs Pakistan is, can you remind me what it is? I know you're up to date in the cricket and all... :D </font>[/QUOTE]Cricket? It's the middle of the bloody winter here - this is the football season. Slovakia v England k.o 6.30 pm.

What time on NWN?. I can't access the site where your spreadsheet is - are you having the same problem?

perhaps it would be better if you PM'd me

[ 10-12-2002, 08:28 AM: Message edited by: Donut ]