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well, heres the q...
of course you and you loved one has gone through a lot (hopefully), and you know each other very well... i was just wondering, small things count. does it to you? to me it does, A LOT! http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...es/biggrin.gif ------------------ http://publish.hometown.aol.com/tobb...es/bahamut.gif http://www.123imagehost.com/images/s...y/chiharu1.gif You know what happened. We are ONE, WE ARE, ahh.. er... I AM http://www.hometown.aol.com/lasttrue...hiharumut4.gif ...wehehehe and... Stay ahead of the Avalanche or risk being buried...;) |
As everyone here knows, I'm a SingleDawg...
but, I must say this. Little things mean more than the big things. They show what is in the "inner" heart. The part that no-one else sees... I'll give some examples when I stop crying http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...les/crying.gif ------------------ http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...s/rudedawg.jpg http://www.wizardrealm.com/images/rdawg.gif |
Little things count, because they add up to big things. I'm thinking of positive things, however. A kind word, a gracious gesture, doing something unexpectedly kind, no matter how small...these are the nails that hold together a strong relationship between two people.
On the other hand, promises broken, no matter how small, snide comments, refusing to budge on issues, petty jealousies...these are the termites that eat away and will eventually erode a relationship. I've found that in the long run, the huge things are rarely what make or break a relationship...it is the little things that count the most. http://www.wizardrealm.com/images/saz.gif |
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http://www.wizardrealm.com/images/saz.gif ...concerned about his friend. |
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Just remembering the "little things" she forgot to do, and the "little habit" she picked up. His name was Richard... ------------------ http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...s/rudedawg.jpg http://www.wizardrealm.com/images/rdawg.gif |
everything matters to me.. big or little http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/smile.gif its the thought that counts http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/smile.gif
------------------ Swordmaster to the King of Riva.. ALL HAIL TO BELGARION KING OF RIVA http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/MON28.gif |
Awww, RudeDawg...
I guess it happens to all of us, at some point in time. But you are so right, it is the little things. Little things, left unattended, turn into BIG things. I'm truly sorry, my friend. But you will find someone else! Let your wonderful heart be seen. http://www.wizardrealm.com/images/saz.gif |
i love the lil things better... those are my specialty... i know they count more... and it will...
but if some doesnt realize that, then whats the use! http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/frown.gif ------------------ http://publish.hometown.aol.com/tobb...es/bahamut.gif http://www.123imagehost.com/images/s...y/chiharu1.gif You know what happened. We are ONE, WE ARE, ahh.. er... I AM http://www.hometown.aol.com/lasttrue...hiharumut4.gif ...wehehehe and... Stay ahead of the Avalanche or risk being buried...;) |
thattl be ayt... that make the two of us!!! though i am not single coz i broke up with someone... jsut plain ol single...
im with ya bro! http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...les/crying.gif ------------------ http://publish.hometown.aol.com/tobb...es/bahamut.gif http://www.123imagehost.com/images/s...y/chiharu1.gif You know what happened. We are ONE, WE ARE, ahh.. er... I AM http://www.hometown.aol.com/lasttrue...hiharumut4.gif ...wehehehe and... Stay ahead of the Avalanche or risk being buried...;) |
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The bad memories are when the "little things" are left behind. When she no longer cares if you are happy, or sick. When you notice she quit saying "Thank You" When you stop caring about her day. You can still go through the motions with the "big things", the dates, the dinners with friends, the outward appearance. but the private things are gone. "Goodnight" means "Goodbye", and your heart doesn't skip when you hear her voice on the phone. You know it's over when you suspect there's someone else, and the only pain is your pride. Besides that, there was only relief that it was over, and you weren't the bad guy. On the OTHER hand, the "little things" make your life worth living. I believe that joy is relative to the risk to reach it. To have the ultimate joy, you must risk total annihilation. Some times you fall, but sometimes you fly. And I'm here to tell you. It's worth the risk, I SWEAR TO G*D, when it works, love is the greatest... It is worth the risk. ------------------ http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...s/rudedawg.jpg http://www.wizardrealm.com/images/rdawg.gif |
ahh... that sux RD...
but amen to you brotha!!(Writes notes in his notebook ;D) ------------------ http://publish.hometown.aol.com/tobb...es/bahamut.gif http://www.123imagehost.com/images/s...y/chiharu1.gif You know what happened. We are ONE, WE ARE, ahh.. er... I AM http://www.hometown.aol.com/lasttrue...hiharumut4.gif ...wehehehe and... Stay ahead of the Avalanche or risk being buried...;) |
wish I knew... http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no.../lovestory.gif
still single |
Well I am sad to say the little things count - things like making himself a cup of coffee and not getting me a cup of tea; walking in when I am reading and turning on the telly volume way up; leaving all the bills etc for me; blaming me when his clothes aren't washed but they are under his bed; finding the copy of my latest short story I gave to him to give to his paremts crumpled on the floor and used as scratch paper; losing his PIN numbers 6 times running so he CANT handle the finances when we are on holiday; refusing to talk to me or the dog for hours when his PC crashes; if the dog barks loud enough at night to wake him but not me screaming and throwing things at Max loud enough to not only wake me up but get the adrenaline flowing so much no way can I sleep for hours; refusing to admit he can't do the networking between our PCs so he has a printer and cable access but I don't; telling every ine he made his own web site when I did it; not bothering to look at the new version of my web site ... etc, etc, etc......
Sad and sh***** line up isn't it. ------------------ There is only one kiwidoc, accept no substitutes http://www.drhope.fsnet.co.uk/doctor.gif STANDARD OPERATING PROCEEDURE www.judyhope.co.uk |
Trust, respect and honesty are the foundation for any good relationship...you destroy one and the rest crumble...with these things intact, you don't really need the little things at all, although they make for excellent maintenance techniques. The little things are building blocks toward them and polish to keep them in good condition. http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...miles/wink.gif
Little things lead to bigger things and an overall better relationship. For some reason, there is more trust and ease with a person who will take time out to acknowledge your presence. If I have enough of the little things, I wouldn't want the bigger things. http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...miles/wink.gif Lack of the smaller nice-ities in a relationship (even if it is just a light intentional touch as he/she passes you on their way elsewhere) can make a lot of difference in how lonely the other person feels or how much they are willing to give back. Currently single, and living in the same house with my ex at the same time, if I find myself missing those little things, the bigger things (dinners, movies, shopping, etc.) don't make up for it. I have had a discussion about this with my him but it appears that the action he has taken beyond all the agreeing with me during the conversation proves he could care less so we remain just friends. Good friends, but deep down, I need those little intimate gestures if we are ever going to move forward. Mind you, crossing a line where some big things are involved (i.e. lack of respect as in not letting the other person speak in their defense when verbally attacked in front of the other person's family members) can really take a good thing in a backward direction and keep it there for a while, if not ruin it altogether. (If I had been at fault to begin with, perhaps I could understand, but it was a no-fault situation and I was doing my best to repair it.) Do I sound confused and lonely? LOL I don't feel like I am but this pairing, as a relationship certainly has become so. http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/frown.gif Moni ------------------ http://members.aol.com/lasttrueprincess/images/ltp4.gif |
In a word... yes
------------------ In the kingdom of the blind, the one-eyed man is pimp. http://lordraptor0.tripod.com/index.html http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...s/chickenL.gif |
Moni it sounds like you and me are pretty much in the same boat, an dits a really s*** boat to be in. http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/frown.gif
Want a big, warm, comforting hug? |
As the song says:
Blow me a kiss from across the room, Say I look nice when I'm not, Touch my hair as you pass my chair; Little things mean a lot, Kneel with me at the side of the bed Call me at six on the dot A line a day when you're far away Little things mean a lot Give me the warmth of a secret smile To show me you haven't forgot That always and ever, now and forever Little things mean a lot. ------------------ http://www.wheatsheaf.freeserve.co.uk/roastspurs.gif Save Chip - Don't let Sarah win! Official Titterer of the Laughing Hyenas |
I did the little things...I wasn't enough
I felt all the things I should have...it wasn't enough I told her all the things I should have...it wasn't enough 19 years flushed away...and I would do it again. Because once it was enough. Those were wonderful times. That is what I remember. The pain is gone and life moves you along so fast, so fast you barely notice whats happened and how far you have come. The pain is gone. I have moved on...and the little things are enough. ------------------ http://home.online.no/~tobak/bloodshadows/crest.gif |
Had to post... going through a divorce and all...
Yes, Rude Dawg... I hear ya. Believe me. http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...les/crying.gif The little things do mean a lot... it is when you stop doing things together, and stop enjoying each other's company - stop talking about things, whether large or small... watching a relationship that was very tight slowly slip into roommates... and then you are leading separate lives. Yes, we grew apart over several months and didn't see it happen till it was too late. I needed to go in one direction and he, another. At least we are parting amicably and wishing each other well... it could be worse. To answer your question, Bahamut, everything matters. The big and the small. The small can errode or build a strong foundation...but the most important thing is trust. For without trust, you don't talk. And communication is paramount. ------------------ http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...es/Charean.jpg Defender for the Light - Goodness knows there is a lot of Dark out there!! - Where are my matches?!? Wandering Soul - Finding my life's calling is Bodhisattva Looking for lost brain - I left it only for a moment....and there it goes... rolling under the table!! Noticing that the Light has gotten further down a Dark Tunnel than expected... Time to get the Lantern... Knowing sooner or later - I will get to the End of this Tunnel to the Open Air once again... |
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kiwidoc, Thanks for the hug and I return one to you! It ain't so bad here with emotional ties so severed, he just pisses me off on days like today when we make plans (as friends) and two days later he is still putting it off until tomorrow. I hate my time being wasted. http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/smile.gif Moni ------------------ http://members.aol.com/lasttrueprincess/images/ltp4.gif |
Wow, I'm glad I wasn't on last night, 'cause I would have taken this thread an ENTIRELY different direction .. ehm...http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/smile.gif
I agree that it is the little things that turn the axis of a relationship. Calling her when you are thinking about her. Giving her flowers when neither one of you has done anything to warrent it. Just because. Having a tape of her favorite songs in your car so when she gets in, you have it ready. Finding out what those songs are... buying food for her at your place so she has something there to eat (some people need more than beer, pop, pretzels and chips). Buying contact case/solution even though you don't have contacts. Making time each week to venture into the other person's world a little. Watch a movie that she wants to see in return for her watching the game with you, or having her get involved in your RPG. Knowing what the little things are that can make your relationship work better IS the big thing. http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/smile.gif BK |
Well, BK, you are the man! http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...miles/wink.gif
my apologies for offending anyone with my whinings lol but it looked like a good place to vent. Personally, I am one who believes the little things are inportant on both ends of the relationship. I do little things for friendships too...you can never have enough love and happiness in your life, unless of course, the other person is an emotionally obsessed, overbearing, soul smothering, life-sucking loser. http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...miles/wink.gif http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/noncgi/smiles/485.gif Moni ------------------ http://members.aol.com/lasttrueprincess/images/ltp4.gif |
well, moni, dont worry bout it! i whine all the time.. and peeps are getting sick of it. so its okay to whine just a lil! j/k! http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...es/biggrin.gif
anyways, umm... guys... i should ask a different question... which do you love more, small or big things? dont make it complimentary, moreso just a mere comparison ex: a business recognition or popcorn and a movie? get? http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...es/biggrin.gif ------------------ http://publish.hometown.aol.com/tobb...es/bahamut.gif http://www.123imagehost.com/images/s...y/chiharu1.gif You know what happened. We are ONE, WE ARE, ahh.. er... I AM http://www.hometown.aol.com/lasttrue...hiharumut4.gif ...wehehehe and... Stay ahead of the Avalanche or risk being buried...;) |
If the business recognition invloves a substantial raise, hand it over lol!
Otherwise, give me the movie and popcorn with a soda to wash it all down. http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...miles/wink.gif Hey, thanks for letting me whine LOL! I promise I'll keep it to a minimum! http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...es/biggrin.gif Moni ------------------ http://members.aol.com/lasttrueprincess/images/ltp4.gif |
Small things definitely... A grand present at Christmas time, a new jacket or shoes on your b-day is all good mind you, but I look for the day to day small things, bring me a cold drink when you see me sweating...put things away after you use them, a little kind word of re-assurance to show me that it matters. A warm touch and kiss in a grid locked traffic jam..I could go on.
For all those who have felt these things slip a little just start on your side, and see whats left. I have found out in the past that once these little things are gone so is the intimacy in most cases. You have to try yourself thow..even if things dont work, you will know that you did try. If anybody needs to have an ear for awhile I am here. I have seen my share.But dont think that if you do these little things that you will automatically fix things..I thought that when my first wife was fading it was my fault. She was cheating on me...blah. blah She faded away herself. Nothing I could do. Well, Im rambling now.. Conan ------------------ http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...les/portal.jpg |
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------------------ http://members.home.net/bradzinser/M...s/Tempest2.jpg Protector and Defender of Nature Awake, Aware and Loving Life to the best of my abilities Tracker of the fair Cleric Charean [This message has been edited by Zeeke75 (edited 06-04-2001).] |
Your the lucky mine picked up herpes http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/smile.gif j/k
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hey!
this is not as funny as it should be. i like this thread of mine to be lil sentimental and make peeps think for awhile.. its not that depressing anyways. ------------------ http://publish.hometown.aol.com/tobb...es/bahamut.gif http://www.123imagehost.com/images/s...y/chiharu1.gif You know what happened. We are ONE, WE ARE, ahh.. er... I AM http://www.hometown.aol.com/lasttrue...chiharumut.gif ...teehee and... Stay ahead of the Avalanche or risk being buried...;) |
I think the most important part of any successful relationship with a female is that I have to be the male in it
------------------ http://www.dabros.com/images/bg2guy/azurewolf1.jpg "I was born of darkness. My fathers eyes closed before mine opened. I am not of this world or the other, and I have the right to be what I am..." "I've put my trust in you, pushed as far as I can go. For all this theres only one thing you should know....." |
geez, isnt that a lil obvious??? http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...es/biggrin.gif
------------------ http://publish.hometown.aol.com/tobb...es/bahamut.gif http://www.123imagehost.com/images/s...y/chiharu1.gif You know what happened. We are ONE, WE ARE, ahh.. er... I AM http://www.hometown.aol.com/lasttrue...chiharumut.gif ...teehee and... Stay ahead of the Avalanche or risk being buried...;) |
Well Iīm a lonewolf, but in a relation small things counts all the time between the big ones. Today, nothing counts except get out of bed, have coffe, work, drink more coffe.. Sorry, didnīt mean to boore ya! http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...miles/wink.gif
Donīt think to much, do and say your heart and show the affection for each other, no matter what you think the otherpart knows or not... ------------------ http://wolfgir.najk.net/wolfie.gif Yawning lazywolf dreaming about nice little fairies...zzzzz |
Yes, definitely, small things do count. It's part of making a relationship work, along with a whole bunch of other things. Small things make us feel good, an added touch when you're not expecting it and it sure means a lot.
------------------ http://publish.hometown.aol.com/tobb...ady_avalon.gif http://hometown.aol.com/lasttrueprin...ladyavalon.gif |
ahh.... well, having coffee alone can make me think about how beautiful life is Wolfie... http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...miles/wink.gif
------------------ http://publish.hometown.aol.com/tobb...es/bahamut.gif http://www.123imagehost.com/images/s...y/chiharu1.gif You know what happened. We are ONE, WE ARE, ahh.. er... I AM http://www.hometown.aol.com/lasttrue...chiharumut.gif 'S favorit pet pea-cock...teehee and... Stay ahead of the Avalanche or risk being buried...;) |
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I like your version better friend! http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...es/biggrin.gif ------------------ http://wolfgir.najk.net/wolfie.gif Yawning lazywolf dreaming about nice little fairies...zzzzz |
then make it my version Wolfie!!! http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...es/biggrin.gif
------------------ http://publish.hometown.aol.com/tobb...es/bahamut.gif http://www.123imagehost.com/images/s...y/chiharu1.gif You know what happened. We are ONE, WE ARE, ahh.. er... I AM http://www.hometown.aol.com/lasttrue...chiharumut.gif 'S favorit pet pea-cock...teehee and... Stay ahead of the Avalanche or risk being buried...;) |
Have to find the beauty my friend! http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...miles/wink.gif
Not much beauty in a computer screen and lotsa people calling to scream about things all the time! ------------------ http://wolfgir.najk.net/wolfie.gif Yawning lazywolf dreaming about nice little fairies...zzzzz |
i still say stick to my post above
------------------ http://www.dabros.com/images/bg2guy/azurewolf1.jpg "I was born of darkness. My fathers eyes closed before mine opened. I am not of this world or the other, and I have the right to be what I am..." "I've put my trust in you, pushed as far as I can go. For all this theres only one thing you should know....." |
I like little things way, way better than big things. I would like for a girl to give me a kiss every once in awhile, or make me laugh (Or at least try to make my laugh) when i'm down. I don't know why I posted this because I'm seventeen and always have been single. *Sigh*
------------------ Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, I just don't have to listen. http://train.missouri.org/~prestons/.../flamedrag.gif |
IMHO, the real question is not whether you think it's the big or little things that make/break a relationship, but what your love thinks is important. Everyone feels loved in different ways. It is important to know what you need yourself, but it's very important to know what makes your partner feel loved, and to do those things as frequently as you can. Even if you think you've told them enough, or showed them enough... if they need more, then give them more! Otherwise, you are withholding what your love needs from you and then the difficulties can begin. And of course, the key to all of this is communication ~ talking with each other openly and honestly about what you each need. That's my take on the "Is it the big things or the little things in a relationship". http://www.tgeweb.com/cgi-bin/ubb/no...iles/smile.gif ------------------ http://www.paulbunyan.net/mnssc/bili.gif Sometimes I think I understand everything, then I regain consciousness. |
This may answer nothing, but I'll post it anyways.
There is a look a woman can give a man that can stop his heart mid-beat and cause his breath to get stuck in his throat like a brick. With that one look he'll give her the world or at least his world. Just once I would like to know if I've ever made a woman feel that way. |
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