.
Fully pissed off by Cal and shadow, Kaltia turns her attention to Tancred's box. IDIOTS! Don't you know a rebel can hear a whisper at 400m! UNLEASH CHOC! *watches the rag-tag army run for it* All in the name of spam :D

"RUMBLED! Run for it!"
"Women and Swords first!"
The luckless paladin fairly leaps out of the crate and comes down running - not a bad feat in plate armour, really - heading for a likely-looking door in the south wall. He doesn't actually get to see the moment of puzzlement on the faces of the Rebels as they realise that the 'rag-tag army' is, in fact, one man and a talking sword - but obviously their wits are about them. Mind you, beingpursued by an irate mad cat can give a paladin's feet wings...

And a teenager with PMS!

And a teenager with PMS![/QB]</font>[/QUOTE]Holy Soiled Underwear! You Rebels don't mess about when it comes to psychological warfare, do you?

And a teenager with PMS!</font>[/QUOTE]Holy Soiled Underwear! You Rebels don't mess about when it comes to psychological warfare, do you?[/QB]</font>[/QUOTE]Nope. And speaking of holy soiled underwear...I'm guessing that's what this poor paladin is experiencing right now? (CHOC! BITE HIS KNEECAPS OFF!)

Reaching for his Paladin Utility Belt, Tancred draws a small clockwork mouse, gives it a few winds, and tosses it behind him. It zooms away, squeaking quite realistically... and Choc can do nothng but respond to ancient mental conditioning placed there at the dawn of time into all cats!

Tancred looks behind him, grinning gleefully at this moment of ingenious triumph... and promptly runs straight into the wall with a clatter of armour and the *THUD* of an unarmoured head hitting various furnishings.

***

"When he wakes up, he's going to wish he'd got that helmet out of hock," tuts Karnas the sword.

.
WHich would leave him at the mercy of the teenager with PMS, hmmm?

.
WHich would leave him at the mercy of the teenager with PMS, hmmm?</font>[/QUOTE]I would have included some Prozac, but there's only so much room in a Paladin Utility Belt, you know! What do you think this is, a Neverwinter Nights Inventory Screen?

.
WHich would leave him at the mercy of the teenager with PMS, hmmm?</font>[/QUOTE]I would have included some Prozac, but there's only so much room in a Paladin Utility Belt, you know! What do you think this is, a Neverwinter Nights Inventory Screen?</font>[/QUOTE]I always wondered how my char could fit at leat 300 potions on that belt...oh well. *nags Tancred to death*.
Besides, Prozac doesn't work. it just makes you physically unable to cry.

I always wondered how my char could fit at leat 300 potions on that belt...oh well. *nags Tancred to death*.
Besides, Prozac doesn't work. it just makes you physically unable to cry.[/QB][/QUOTE]

I'm a paladin, not a pharmacist... oh, wait, I'm being nagged to death.

"Agh! No! Stop! Mercy! I'm NOT afraid of commitment! I... of COURSE I don't chat up other women! Wait - I don't even chat up! Do you think they TEACH sex ed. at the Monastery? No, you look fine in that... no, I'm not being sarcastic! No, look, you can drive if you want to... no, it's not that I don't WANT to drive for you... no, really, the cheese spread and curry sandwiches are fine... I DO like your cooking! I AM ABLE TO EXPRESS MY FEELINGS!!!!"

A fate worse than death. Hurry up, rescue party, I can't take much more of this.