Ironworks Gaming Forum - The Wheel of Time(RP),Chapter 1-Questionable Alliances(open)

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Ladisha's eyes glittered in anger,
"I do not forget myself. You forget the 3 Oaths prevent me from harming someone with the Power. However, you are welcome to take a switch to me and share the pain, Asha'man," she exhaled and ran through the old novice exercises for calmness: water running over smooth rocks, wind blowing through grass. Surprisingly, it worked, and her anger dissipated, "This is why most Aes Sedai choose older men for Warders, they do not want to deal with childish outbursts like the one you unleashed upon me," she shook her head and sighed, returning to her chai and looking out the window once more, "Learn to control your emotions, or you may end up getting the both of us killed,"

"I would never hurt you! You know I wouldn't" Ailurin's eyes stung. He muttered "You wouldn't have to use the Power anyway... you could use the flat of my blade, or the scabbard or something... I said I'm sorry, and you know I'd die before I let someone harm you. I will not endanger you! You know I wouldn't!" His voice was raw, and the bond reflected only pain. He turned his back on her and sat down. "Use the power to hurt you?! How could you even suggest that?" He lowered his head in his hands, and continued, "Do you want to use.. compulsion" he spat the word "on me? If you do, I won't try to stop you... I owe you everything, and your the only one I have." his answer was cryptic, and made the Aes Sedai wonder again about his past. The bond's pain intensived. Then it stopped abrutly, as he shieled his emotions and hurt from her. It hit her like an icy slap in the face.

"You acted against me by severing my weaves and yelling at me like I am the one at fault," Ladisha said edgily, "You are a new Warder and a freshly trained Asha'man, you could have very well hurt me," she twisted her Great Serpent ring on her finger, "And not only is...Compulsion an unknown weave, I wouldn't even use a vile thing such as that to save my own life," she sighed and touched his shoulder, "I am sorry for raising my voice to you, but I do what I believe I must, otherwise I wouldn't be a Blue," she smiled breifly then frowned, "What happened to your family, Ailurin?"

"What?!" her question threw him totally off guard. "What are you talking about?" guilt shot though the bond, and was hastily covered up. "Why do you ask?" his expression was wary and guarded. The bond reflected nothing. He had taken hold of Saidin to steady himself, and his face was calm, and his eyes burned with ice.

[ 02-01-2003, 09:02 PM: Message edited by: Calaethis Dragonsbane ]

Ladisha blinked,
"When one says that someone is the only one they have left, that person is to believe that this one has no family, am I correct?"

Ailurin bowed his head. "So you caught my lapse. I should be dead. Why did you bond me and save my life?" his voice was tortured. "I should be in the ground with them... I... couldn't protect them. Even with this accursed Power, the light burn me. They slew them because I had the Power. Or... did they... I don't know... I was away... soldiers... the entire place wiped out... it could have been a mob, or soldiers - I don't know. When I got back, no-one was left - the entire village gone - I... think they, my people slew my family first - and were overrun by whitecloaks or someone. It doesn't matter anymore. The fact is they are dead and I am not. They deserved life - I don't. You saved me, and look at how I repay you?" his voice was even more raw, and the bond... had ceased any emotion, "Now I can't even harm myself, for fear of harming you..." he looked up at her, his eyes in dispair. "You know almost everything now.. are you happy Mistress?" he barked a sharp laugh, "I don't even have the right to call you that." there were no tears in his eyes. "I'd ask you to release me - but there would be no point. I have nothing to live for - not even revenge. I... " he stopped. Then with an effort said, "I don't know.. I don't have a purpose in life... I don't know who I am, or where I belong or anything... I'm just a wretched creature... " he sighed. "And a spoiled child" He cut off, refusing to sink to self pity. He held Saidin, and would continue to hold it - until he could no longer unless the Aes Sedai told him to snap out of it.

Ladisha pursed her lips in thught. She was not used to dealing with things such as this, but she knew what to do,
"Everybody deserves life until proven otherwise, Ailurin, and you have done nothing to show that you do not deserve it," she laid a hand on his head softly, "The Wheel weaves as the Wheel wills, and your family was caught in an unfortunate twist of the threads. I will not release you, for you would likely kill yourself if you did. I saved your life because I cannot stad by idly and watch innocent people die," though of course the Oaths prevented her from helping. You owe me nothing but your protection," she hoped her words had helped to console him.

Ailurin shook his head, "I owe you a lot more then just my protection Aes Sedai... I owe you everything. As I said before, you're all I have... there is more to this.. but you are not ready to hear it- even as I am not ready to reveal it. There is a lot more to it - not all of my family are dead - but... that is not something I want to get into right now..." he shook his head rejectedly, and whispered "forgive my childish outburst please, ...I... you are the first person that knows of this... no-one else knows. None." he shook his head again, and released the power, broke down and wept like a child - not an Asha'man, but of an addolescent, one who had lost everything save his life.

Rising smoothly, Ladisha knelt next to Ailurin and cupped his head in her hands, wiping away tears with her thumbs, "You can tell me when you are ready, dear, I would not pressure you over this," she had not known his past was so stricken. Arranging her skirts carefuly, she sat next him and rubbed his trembling back.

Ailurin turned around and buried his face in his Aes Sedai's skirts. This was the first time he'd mourned for his family, Ladisha could feel it though the bond. Eventually he looked up at her, his eyes still stung with tears and whispered "Forgive me?" then he closed his eyes, and sank back into her embrace, "I... do you accept me as your Warder Mistress? My life, my sword, my... soul is yours." he shuddered, and looked up at her again shyly, "Mistress..? My childish outburst - it won't happen again... I'm sorry."