What we were doing was sending troops to help out mother england when she invaded turkey. Why England invaded Turkey is a whole other question, the answer to which I have no idea. </font>[/QUOTE]Sorry mate, I was actually making a rhetorical question, emphasising the ludicrousness of a war that meant individual Australian men were invading a nation and shooting people with whom they had no quarrel.

Flash Aussies success with secret mission! at 1600 Hrs eastern U.S time an elite group of Aussie special forces unleash a single Tasmainian Devil on the eastern shore of Canada and within 15 min Mack's killer Beaver was taken out. Services will be held next sunday at noon for more imformation see www.BeaverBitesNoMore.gone film at Eleven.

HA! HA! just kidding gang.

Come come my Commonwealth Brothers and Sisters of Australia..

We both have the Queen on our money don't we????

Thanks for the post Attalus about Canada's D-Day contribution.. :D Deathkillers mention of Canada's war history left me a little.. dry..

AAAARGGGH! Did you not read!? I said let's leave America and other allies out of it. Of course America would win... ;) Whatever side they took. But that's not the hypothetical question posed!</font>[/QUOTE]Ah whoops sorry Yorick, I misread it :(

Well in that case....Australia ;)

It all depends.
What if the Aussies went in first and launched a deadly projectile Foster's can attack on the diplomatic moose tribe?
What if the Canucks got in the first punch with a devastating goose bombing?
Who knows?
The answers can be only found through meditation and a large international tournament of stereotypical national animals.

Round 1. The American machine vs. the communist bear
Round 2. The British bulldog vs. that tricky to open (without opposable thumbs) dog food can
Round 3. The highly anticipated Canadian Mooses vs the 'roos.

Rumours abound that the renegade squad known only as D.I.N.G.O's have been sabotaging Canada defence lines, but in retaliation, large lumberjacks with moustaches have been seen chopping down trees, which have landed on key Oz positions.

Tune in again at later to find out less.

I can't read the whole topic cause I don't have time, but:

It depends on who starts it. That country would lose because the rest of the world would fight them. If they both started it, then the U.S. would back Canada- Canada is a big source of lumber and other raw materials, but Australia doesn't do much for the U.S.. If other countries weren't included, then I'd have to say Australia, unfortunately. I don't know the Aussie military condition, but Canada's helicopters are 40 years old and need 40 hours of service in order to fly for one hour, and the entire system is terribly underfunded.

The Canadian Military should buy West Ed's subs, and make them work without the tracks! :D
And our military couldn't be worse than Australias!

I dunno... the Rugby gang are a bunch of tough sob's no doubt... but the Canadians get to use STICKS (and they REALLY know how to use em), and those skates can give you a nasty cut. And if the hockey players don't get you, they've got the CFL to fall back on (reserve forces)... those guys get to wear PADS. Of course the Rugby players will say that "real men don't wear pads" and therefore they're just plain tougher than the CFL guys... but that doesn't make it any easier to pop a guy upside the head when he has a big padded helmet on. At least with the Hockey players it'll be a fair fight because they'll throw off all their protective gear just as the fight starts.

They both know how to make a good brew... so there's no strategic beer advantage, both sides would be good and blown away before any real rukus started.

And they're both always up for a good party... so whoever wins, the after-war party will be one hell of a blowout.

I'd have to give the nod to whoever had home field advantage, let me know when tickets go on sale [img]smile.gif[/img] .

this is a low blow. As long as Australia simply attacked Quebec- the rest of the provinces would simply watch and cheer Australia...

bow to the meow

[img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img]

Quite obviously this war is something the Mother country could not possibly allow to happen. It would be like allowing your two sons to fight a duel!

:D

BUT - hypothetically speaking I think Canada would win, it's kinda hard for the Australians to fight with all those chips on their shoulders! ;)

[ 01-13-2003, 05:53 AM: Message edited by: Donut ]

I find this thread offensive. How many of you like to have their nation mocked?

Crikey! Yorick has gone Flippin' batty!
And what's he on aboot invadin Canada? Eh?
More importantly, we must consider, does Canada even have an army? :D

Actually, I have been told from a very reliable source that if our forces were all at home, even the USA would have a difficult time mounting a succesfull invasion of Australia. Logistically, it is too vast, too sparse and too remote - with the Australian troops very well trained in the type of warfare needed to defend an enourmous desert and a few cities, with a small force and very limited technology. In 'man to man' war games, Australia consistently outperforms our rivals..er..allies. ;)

Our forces are primarily defensive and would struggle to invade someone like Canada. So it may be that home advantage would win...

Aren't Atari Teenage Riot German? I know Alec Empire definitely is...

Hi Luvian. Do you really find this thread offending? Hmm let me elaborate. Since you are in Montreal, Quebec I´m sure you have noticed that many Ontarians tend to mock your, IMHO, lovely province. But then many from your province tend to mock my exquisite province, Ontario. Such low blows can be offensive sometimes. But this thread? Lots of people posting about a country they have never been blessed enough to live in? :D Let them keep their petty squabble while we continue to enjoy our fabulous country. And remember, they only mock because they are envious. ;) You know that as well as I do. :D

[ 01-13-2003, 07:58 AM: Message edited by: WillowIX ]

Did anybody already mention the cause of this war? That's very important, as we all know, that the just cause always wins! :D

Australian craving for maple syrup? :D Or perhaps Canadian craving for better beer? The one we get from the south is not much to brag about! :D

I never heard, that Australia would be famous for it's beer. Canada definitely shouldn't have a war because of this WillowIX! Did you know, that Europe is exporting some really good brands - ask Johnny! [img]smile.gif[/img]

Not only do we have the finest beers, but we also have Bundaberg Rum [img]smile.gif[/img] from my home town.

You have beer in Australia? [img]graemlins/wow.gif[/img] Is it worth a war?

Hell yeah

Hm, maybe my next holidays I'll fly to Australia and have a look on my own. That's of course only if war has ended until then... ;)

For our Australian friends:

The gentleman asks why out of all the movies Americans make about Vietnam - why are they never mentioned? Well, I really get a laughout of this. This is usually the cry of frustrated Englishmen about WW2.

First off they are American movies about American people for American audiences. Notice anything here?

Secondly- the Australian contingent was rather small (though of good quality) compared to the overall American commitment.

By the way the Thais, South Koreans, new Zealanders or filipinos dont get much air time either.

Yepp that is probably the reason. That arrogant and ignorant reason is recognized in every country save America (=Hollywood in this case). That´s why I have started to love European movies. That Hollywood is losing it, is of course the stronger reason though. :D

[ 01-13-2003, 12:33 PM: Message edited by: WillowIX ]

Actually, I have been told from a very reliable source that if our forces were all at home, even the USA would have a difficult time mounting a succesfull invasion of Australia. Logistically, it is too vast, too sparse and too remote - with the Australian troops very well trained in the type of warfare needed to defend an enourmous desert and a few cities, with a small force and very limited technology. In 'man to man' war games, Australia consistently outperforms our rivals..er..allies. ;)

Our forces are primarily defensive and would struggle to invade someone like Canada. So it may be that home advantage would win...</font>[/QUOTE]That's quite a conforting thought. Does Indonesia know this?

Depends on the spirit of the jest. Most US flames I find offensive, but there are some really funny jabs out there too (the current pic of Pres GWB for example - LLAO! [img]graemlins/hehe.gif[/img] ).

The cause of the war would either by Soccer, or Beer.
But you people are delusional... The Germans make the best beer! [img]graemlins/cheers.gif[/img]

Wow... that's a crazy thought.. I could have sworn I've seen American war movies advertised and shown over here.
Must have been drinking too much of that cold beer they don't serve here either. [img]tongue.gif[/img]

[ 01-13-2003, 03:51 PM: Message edited by: Talthyr Malkaviel ]

There was a funny British joke about how they drink warm beer. "Why do we drink warm beer? Cause Lucas made the refrigerator!" [img]smile.gif[/img] Anyway, back to the original topic, Australia would have a very hard time winning because Canada is so big (geographically), and both countries have small armies. Hundreds of thousands of square kilometres just empty except for rocks and dirt and trees if it is below the treeline.

Well- Oz isn't very dissimilar there- it is largely uninhabited, but where Canada is mostly big blocks of ice and abandoned old freezers, Australia is full of open desert and crushed beer can plains.

If Canada and Australia went to war...

In a beautiful pea green boat,
One would take honey and one would take money,
But neither would stay afloat.

Oops, methinks me feels the grog kicking in......

http://64.207.13.28/mysmilies/otn/violent/PANZER.gif

P.S. Talthyr....Err, nice sig, I think I seen it before. Can I drill you about this?
;)

[ 01-13-2003, 04:41 PM: Message edited by: Charlie ]

Making sure we dont start a war on two fronts let me make this clear. Germany does brew the best beer,(whoops belgium has just declered war) Canada and Australia make very good beer its just that it's so hot down here, 35C as i type, We ozzy's get to drink a lot more of it!
while Australia and Canada are waging war can we make sure that someone stays behind and guards the brewaries. We dont want them Septics from north of the mexican border getting hold of real beer while our backs are turned :)

:D

my money would be on the mountain bears, grizzlies and pumas of canada to beat the everliving poo out of the kangaroos, koalas and dingoes of austrailia [img]smile.gif[/img]

and in a fight native indians vs aborignies, id plump for the boomerang option

so a 1-1 tie on native populations and animals [img]tongue.gif[/img]
resident populations id have to go with the ex-convicts vs the peaceloving, marijuana smokin (topical, topical! not an insult or generalisation) canadians so:

2-1 to the aussies [img]smile.gif[/img]

as for the armed forces? bah forget the armed forces, not as much fun as the other possiblities [img]smile.gif[/img]

I assume they do. Don't know for sure though.

Are there any two more unlikely countries to go to war?

New Zealand and Greenland perhaps?

[ 01-14-2003, 06:52 PM: Message edited by: Leonis ]

I assume they do. Don't know for sure though.

Are there any two more unlikely countries to go to war?

New Zealand and Greenland perhaps?</font>[/QUOTE]How about England and Argentina! And what would be the country least likely to have a civil war.... how about FIJI! The peaceful Fijian holiday destination would never have a civil coup or anything would it?

In all seriousness, I remember hearing a computer determined the place in the world least likely to ever experience a war. The answer was the Falkland Islands.

So I'll take a plunge and suggest that Moravia and Laos would be very unlikely to go to war against each other. Otherwise I'd suggest Jamaica and Papua New Guinea.

Review previous posts regarding Tasmainian Devils. I belive the pumas + bears developed tree climbing abilities in case war broke out :D :D :D

regarding our aborignies they probably would not win an offensive battle but gee talk about surviving in their own backyard....
Even the poms (English) dropped nukes on them (TRUE)and they still survive in the surrounding desert. [img]graemlins/stunned.gif[/img]

hehe my money would be on a puma over a tasmanian devil, got size advantage and only marginally lacking in ferocity.
not talking about the city or village dwelling aboringines, talking about the few remaining fully native ones, they are very skilled hunters and im guessing pretty good warriors still as well, whereas in canada now all the natural indians i think dont have their own reservations, so are pretty much westernised.

btw "poms" is a deregatory racist comment, im from uk [img]tongue.gif[/img] not that i care particularly (still yet to hear a good insult for the english, were uninsultable, woohoo [img]tongue.gif[/img] ) , but be careful with saying things like that or the moderators will rearend you [img]tongue.gif[/img]