[img]graemlins/thumbsup.gif[/img] LOL at Epona and LoA! :D

Dreamer, I don't usually ask for particular parts *hint, hint, people* But maybe you could put Kazzie as Arwen and switch me to Eowyn? ;) If not, s'ok. :D

Keep up the laughs! [img]smile.gif[/img]

Great work Velkyn! Your stories would make an excellent website :D
Still, you know we are all willing here to wade through all the laughs, the thumbsups and the praise to get to the next installment.
[img]graemlins/thumbsup.gif[/img] ;)

Well, Kaz stated she definatly didn't want to be Arwen after I showed her some of the Rivendell dialogue;). So far, you are the only candidate, but if you totally dislike the part I'll give you another of course [img]smile.gif[/img]
To all the others: Thanks for all the postive comments. I'm glad IW: The movie is still populair, even after 5 editions [img]smile.gif[/img] .
I already finished alot of the Fellowship of the ring dialogue, and I have the last alliance part planned out already as well. I have a feeling this will turn out to be the longest movie to date. But first, I'll get some sleep and finish the next part tomorow.

dam right...or maybe thats because not many women are good with their swords? :D

wonderful story...
you loyal servant...
dizzy!!!

Well, normally I never ask, since you pick people well, but since others have I might as well jump on the band wagon and ask if I could be someone. :D
If I could be someone at all, could it be either Boromir, Faramir, or whoever you think best. ;)

NO dang orcs better mess with my mistress Epona. *draws his
sword, aseri, have at ye!

Both are still open. But since I may not get past the first book, I'll make it Boromir.

I've beeen feeling a bit down lately but you story picks me right up and makes me laugh. Thanks. Keep em coming.

P.S. IT's realy good!

Nah, that's fine. [img]smile.gif[/img] I'm ok with Arwen, and the story will be great no matter what. :D

Both are still open. But since I may not get past the first book, I'll make it Boromir.</font>[/QUOTE]Cheers [img]graemlins/thumbsup.gif[/img]

With an Orcish patrol approaching, Epona tries to warn the Zirocian forces before it is too late

Epona: Shit.. what was the number again? Oh, uh, 9-1-1. *quickly dials emergency number on her cell phone.
-Friendly voice-:This number costs…more then you think. Press one to continue.
Epona: *Dials a one.
-Friendly voice-: Please hold.
Meanwhile, only a few yards away.
Orc: Wait. You hear that? Methinks someone is behind rock over there.
Chieftain Sazerac: Hahaha, nono, too obvious. Me no stupid. Is a dec.. decep… something.
Epona: *Crawls even deeper behind rock.
-Friendly voice-: Hello, you are now connected to the Ironworks Emergency hotline.….
Epona: Just in time, listen I…
-FV-: No operators are available at this time, please hold while we play some of our merry tunes to help you pass the time.
Epona: Grrr!
Orc: Hey, you! Human, you no move! Chief, hey Chief!
Chieftain Sazerac: So, methinks me has caught a human spy yes.
Epona: Uh, well, hello there green-looking. You..uh…like to dance? My phone has a few nice tunes.
Chieftain Sazerac: Dance?

Meanwhile, back at the palace, Ziroc seems to have everything completely under control
Ziroc: *Runs down the hallway.
Reeka: *Comes running after Ziroc. Wait for us!
Memnoch: Yes! Wait for us.
Ziroc: Quickly then, that demon isn’t waiting.
Reeka: We’re coming. *Pushes passing soldier aside. Move it mate! V.I.P coming through.

Ziroc: *Locks magically looking door behind them.
Memnoch: Phew, that was close.
Ziroc: Say that, this is all your fault!
Reeka: My fault? The scroll should have specified that it was HAStur HAStur HAStur and not HasTUR Ha… hey! The ground is shaking again!
Memnoch: Z… think of your blood pressure. You look real creepy when your skin becomes so red.
Reeka: Uh…boss.. what are you doing with that axe?
Memnoch: *Pulls axe out of Zirocs hand. Relax, look at it from the bright side. There is A) no news from Epona. So I guess nothings happing at the front. And B) We are completely safe here as long we have your staff of power placed against the door.
Reeka: Oh, was that your Staff of Power? Well, that end table in the dining needed
a new leg, and you did ask me to fix it..
Reeka: Uh guys, what are you doing? C’mon, this is not funny anymore.

While our heroes are..well…killing each other. Epona has the date of her life

Chieftain Sazerac: ..I said YOUNG MAN! Pick yourself off the ground!
Epona: Young man, cause you’re in a new town…
Orc2: You no need to be unhappy..huhuhu.
Chieftain Sazerac: ITS FUN TO STAY Y.M.C.A
All: Y.M.C.A!

Meanwhile, a few URL’s away, at mount Choc..

Choc: .. And in response to Belgium thread to nuke N.Y. president Bush made the following statement: Please don’t hurt us, we’ll never insult your waffles again. The Belgium prime minister…
Melusine: *Comes running into the throne room. Chocie! Great news!
Choc: Grrr, how many times do I have to explain this to you. DON’T CALL ME CHOCIE! I’m an evil overlord and soon-to-be ruler of the internet. You think my enemy’s are ever going to take me serious like this?
Melusine: Aaah, you look so cute when your mad.
Choc: *Bangs head into the wall. Ok, just tell me the news and get lost.
Melusine: Well, your evil cat forces are almost ready for deployment.
Choc: Good. With my loyal troops by my side, and the one disk in my Dvd player, none will be able to stop me. Mwhuhahahaha.
Arledrian: Excuse me milord, telephone.
Choc: Thanks, ‘ello, Choc here.
Elrond: Hi! I’d like to respond to your ad for that free furnace.
Choc: Furnace? Free? I think you have the wrong number mate. Just who are you anyway?
Elrond: Wrong number?! Gotta go then, costs me a fortune to call from middle earth to the internet.
Choc: Hello? Hello? Hu, weirdo.
Melusine: There is one other thing Chocie.
Choc: Are you still here? Alright, what is it? And stop calling me Chocie.
Melusine: Well, a patrol I send out earlier still hasn’t returned.
Choc: Bah, they’ll turn up sooner or later. Now leave me be.
Melusine: Fine.

At the same time, on the other side of the great link

Chieftain Sazerac: eeeeeeeh, wanna feel my body baby?
Orcs: Check it out, check it out.
Chieftain Sazerac: Every Orc wants to be a maaaaacho man, always in demand.
All: Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, macho, macho man.
Epona: He’s gotta be a macho man.

Chieftain Sazerac: Hu, human woman shows us a good time. So we let her go.
Orcs: Yeeeeeeeaaaaaaaah!!!!! Byyyyyye Epona. *Jump through the link.

Epona: Cough…too much music….much reach phone…
Phone: We are now connecting you to the central.
Epona: At last.
Phone: Hello! You are now connected to the Ironworks Ironworks emergency hotline.
Epona: Hello? Listen….
Phone: *Beep. Press a one if you suspect you have dialled the wrong number. Press a two to report a case of spamming. Press a three to report an error. Press a four in case of a life/death situa…
Phone: You have dialled a four. Press one if you are being murdered, press two if you suspect someone of flaming. Press three if you want to report suspicious activities of Cat-overlords and…
Phone: You have dialled a four.
Phone: We are now connecting you to the Zirocian palace.
Phone: No operators are available at this time, please hold while we play some of our merry tunes to help you pass the time.
Epona: Nooooooooooooooooo

Ten minutes later.
LoA: This way men!
Guard1: Look! There is a woman lying on the ground!
LoA: Stand back, I’m a doctor.
Guard2: Will she be ok?
LoA: Hm, an overdoses village people. Lethal. But I think we got to her just in time.

Back at the palace
Dizzy: Excuse me sir, we just had a phone call of your border operative. An Orcish patrol has been sighted. Choc can invade any moment now.
Ziroc: All right. Send word to the War Counsel. I have a plan to counter Chocs invasion…
[Dramatic music]

[ 06-09-2002, 03:38 PM: Message edited by: Dreamer128 ]

lol keep up the good work!!!!!!Can I be in the play pretty pleaz?

<font color="gold">Still great, still great... [img]graemlins/awesomework.gif[/img] </font>

Sure, I'll put you in somewhere [img]smile.gif[/img]

YAY! Thank you! [img]graemlins/biglaugh.gif[/img]

np, currently busy with thinking up the next part. I'd like to thank everyone for their patience.

LOL! Great stuff. [img]graemlins/thumbsup.gif[/img]

Has the part of the donkey been taken? [img]tongue.gif[/img]

<font color="gold">A big, bad BUMP! :D </font>

yeah, wheres the new one!

<font color=pink>Ooo i wanna b Arwen, minus the love sory :D </font>

What but thats the only reason she is in the movie ;)

"evil cat forces"
ROFL!
Feel free to use any of mine in battle scenes in which they will be offed, they are all evil!
Great Story! I'm loving it. :D

Sorry it took so long, first I got sick and after that I left the country for two weeks. :(

[ 07-08-2002, 06:03 AM: Message edited by: Dreamer128 ]

The year 2002, Cloudy’s café, the GD
Arvon: Interesting story old-timer, what happened then?
Donut: Bah, I’m not that old. (Now where did my teeth go?)
Arvon: Err..of course not.
Lady Blue: Just, ignore him. Now, the story…
Donut: Alright then, where was I?
Arvon:The war…
Donut: Oh yes…well, with the power of the one disk Choc became unstoppable!
Donut: Soon after the first sighting of Chocian troops, the invasion came!
Donut: One by one, the free boards fell before the might of the disk.
Donut: even when facing impossible odds, Ziroc remained optimistic.

Ziroc: We’re DOOMED, DOOMED I TELL YOU!!!!
Dizzy: Sir, calm down. Everything will be just fine.
Ziroc: CALM DOWN?! HOW CAN I CALM DOWN WITH THOUSANDS OF SPAMMERS AT MY BORDER?!
Dizzy: Uh…
Memnoch: Don’t worry Z. You can be beat him!
Ziroc: How can you be so sure?
Memnoch: I already read the next chapter. And besides, you are the hero, they always win.
Ziroc: I guess that’s true, al right then. This is da plan...

Meanwhile, a few mb south of the GD
Choc: Meow, meow meow meow!!!
Melusine: Lord Choc asks for a full status report.
Sazerac: Invasion goes as plans, Baldurs Gate boards already overrun, most of the forces assembled at the edge of the GD. Waiting for your command.
Choc: Meow, meow, meow!
Melusine: Lord Choc will lead the army himself. Prepare to advance!
Sazerac: Yes M’lady!

Zirocs palace, warroom
Memnoch: ..and an additional wargroup of Elven bowman to the south.
Ziroc: Good, now listen up everyone! [Heroic music starts playing]
Ziroc: As you all know, Chocs army will arrive here within a few hours. Now, we are all that stand between the evil Cat and total domination. Not only are we outnumbered five to one, but we also have to face the huge power of the one disk. Gee, that is a lot isn’t it? Ah damn it, *runs out of the room.
Memnoch: Ahem, well, uh, hehehe, he just has an..uh.. really small bladder. He’ll be back any moment now. Anyway, even though we face impossible odds. I am confident that we will prevail, not because we are stronger or smarter or have some brilliant master plan. Nor are we more devoted or braver. No, we will prevail because WE ARE AMERICANS! And we are better then the rest of world! So…
Dizzy: Uh sir, aren’t you an Australian?
Memnoch:….
Memnoch:*runs out of the room. Ziiiiiiiiiiiroc, wait for me!!!

Arvon: So, what happened then?
Donut: Well, we managed to convince them it was in their best interest to lead the battle. *reloads his shotgun.
Lady Blue: Then what happened?
Donut: Well, we prepared for battle of course. For Choc was already placing his army into position.

Castle Ziroc, main tower
Ziroc: Just you and me now I guess.
Reeka: Yes sir!
Ziroc: You think we’ll win?
Reeka: Yes sir!
Ziroc: You sound confident, ever done a thing like this before?
Reeka: Yes sir!
Ziroc: Well, besides that I just wanted to say that I treated you badly and I just wanted to apologize for being rude and insensitive, its not often I show my true self but I really think we….
Reeka:*Walks up the stairs, “Hi Z., thanks for watching over my projected imagine, great spell isn’t it”?

Meanwhile, down with the troops
Dizzy: Our forces have taken the planned positions sir!
Memnoch: Good, I hope Ziroc does he’s part well.
Dizzy: Yes, well, at least he and Reeka made up.
Memnoch: Thank god.
Dizzy: Uh sir, I think Z. just threw someone of the tower!
Epona: Excuse me gentlemen, but a messenger just arrived. Chocs forces are marching for the castle and should be here any moment!
Memnoch: Quickly then, into hiding.

Ziroc: *Pulls her up again. All right, you have the spells?
Reeka: Well, I didn’t really have time to check the supplies. Lets have a look.
Ziroc: Hmm, Power word, fart? Death-to-the-Caster? Bigby’s magical firewall?
Reeka: *whistles
Ziroc: And what’s this? Meatier Swarm?
Reeka: Developed it myself! large chunks of ground chuck rain to the ground!
Ziroc: Perhaps I should throw myself of the tower. Did you bring my book of death magic?
Reeka: Uh, actually I needed it to test Erhdolt's Endurable Eraser. It works great by the way.
Ziroc: Well, at least I still have my wands. Especially the wand of Meteor Storm should stall them. You did take it from my safe right?
Reeka: Of course not! How come you didn't tell me the lock on your safe
was broken ? That little guy you hired couldn't get it
opened, so he took it back to town to work on it."
Ziroc: *grasp. How about the other spellbook?
Reeka: Uhh.. I seem to have forgotten to bring the Manual of Mighty and
Marvelous Magic with me Will the Guide to Growing Great
Geraniums do as well?
Ziroc: *bangs head into the wall. Well, it can’t be helped anymore I guess. We’ll just have to make the best of it. Here, take this wand of fire. You know how it works right?
Reeka: It fires a fireball if I point it at something and say
Braxat' right?
Ziroc: N…

Melusine: Milord, we just detected a huge explosion on the highest tower of castle Ziroc!
Choc: Meow! Meow!
Melusine: It seems to be abandoned, the gates are open as well.
Choc: Meow, meow!
Melusine: Of course! Chieftain Sazerac!
Sazerac: Me stands ready!
Melusine: Take two thirds of the men and charge at the castle, take no prisoners!
Sazerac: *nods
Melusine: I wonder which gardener Ziroc has, the grass is extremely tall.
Choc: Meow! Meow!
Melusine: Sorry sir

Back on the tower
Reeka: Really sorry sir, you alright sir?
Ziroc: I’m alive, and th…what the?! Chocs forces are closing in fast!
Reeka: Want me to cast a spell master?
Ziroc: NO! I’ll use one of my own. starts waving his hands and muttering arcane words.
Suddenly, a dragon appears before the charging spammers.
Sazerac: This not in contract, PULL BACK!

Reeka: (Loudly) "WHAT AN ILLUSION, MASTER! THE CHOCIANS WILL * NEVER * FIGURE
THAT OUT!"
Ziroc: Uh oh.
Reeka: Oh, look, they dispelled it. I wonder how they knew it was an illusion.
Ziroc: Doesn’t matter. Enters local chatbox: This is tower watch calling Memnoch.
Memnoch: Yes, Purple Donkey here over.
Ziroc: Purple Donkey?! Is everything ready, over?
Epona: Purple Chicken calling Tower watch, over. Package is in place. Hostile should encounter is any moment now. You did a good job luring them into the castle with your lightshow earlier, over.
Ziroc: Thanks purple Chicken, what is the status of the troops?
Someguy: Field commander Blue Pigeon here, archers ready for operation clean up, awaiting the big bang.
Ziroc: Roger, ziroc out.
Reeka: Everything ok sir?
Ziroc: Yes, is the magic carpet loaded up?
Reeka: Yes sir, tanks full a’ fuel.
Ziroc: Good, lets go.

Meanwhile, down the hall
Orc1: Ugh, no one here!
Sazerac: What?
Orc2: He be right, there no is anyone here.
Sazerac: You turn place inside out!
Orc1: Yes chief.
Orc3: Uh chiefboss, me finds package on table, your name on it.
Sazerac: To Sazerac, from Ziroc: with ‘burning’ love. That nice.
Orc2: What is in package?
Sazerac: Must be clock, its ticking!
http://users.pandora.be/lode.stevens/abom.JPG]Choc: Meow!!! Meow!!!
Melusine: Our army! Its gone! We’ve been set up!

*Suddenly, thousands of archers arise from the high grass.
Memnoch: Choc! S’ohw rouy yddad?
Melusine: Ha, showing of with his knowledge of Quenya again, we’ll show him. CHOCIANS ATTACK!

Donut: And so, under the ruins of Castle Ziroc, a terrible battle was posted!
Arvon: Who won?
Donut: Well, the Ironworkers seemed to have the advantage when Choc suddenly used his most terrible weapon and used the one disk to hack the main site, and delete his opponents…

Memnoch: Huh? Where did that thunderstorm come from, the sky was clear a minute ago!
Ziroc: That’s a sign of dark magic you idiot, he is using the one disk.
Choc: Fi I t’nac teg Ironworks, enoon lliw. Ll’I eteled uoy lla.
Ziroc: Whats he saying?
Memnoch: Standard badguy speech.
Dizzy: Sir our troop are vani…-plof-.
Ziroc: Vanishing…he must have hacked the main site.
Epona: Damn, what can we do ab…-plof-.
Memnoch: Ziroc! Do something!
Ziroc: All right, all right. Reeka, your spellbag please.
Reeka: *hands him the supplies.
Ziroc: Casts: Bigby’s magical firewall.
Choc: Meow meow!
Ziroc: He’s been locked out, but it will only take him a minute to bypass the security.
Memnoch: Now what?
Ziroc: He is no longer protected by the ring here *Grabs his keyboard and presses ‘ban evil cats’
Choc: Nooooooooooooooooooo
*massive vortex appears, sucking all of Chocs troops in.

two days later, on the battlefield
Epona: Dizzy, we've been out here all day, what do you hope to find?
Dizzy: *Picks up glowing disk. Nothing, nothing at all.

Arvon: What happened to Choc grandpa?
Donut: No one knows, some say his essence is scattered all over the net, others say he is living the second of his nine lives on Ironworks or perhaps his soul is stuck in the one disk. But in truth, he could be anywhere or anything.
Lady Blue: hm, anyone or anything, we’ll think about that. Bye!
Donut: Bye children.
*Arvon and LB leave the post.
Donut: *evil grin.

[ 07-08-2002, 09:29 AM: Message edited by: Dreamer128 ]

Excellent post Dreamer. You have me down to perfection - even the false teeth. The thought of Arvon as grandson is disturbing though. Fortunately I can always turn my hearing aid off. ;)

Darn great story or shall i say movie Dreamer128 i have never read it before to day and if you need any help i can use my "arrows" on the enemy! lol :D

Thats hilarous... well done..

Fantastic as always, Velkyn. [img]graemlins/thumbsup.gif[/img]

Part of it was wrong.The part where I said I was a Blue Pidgeon was wrong.I'm a blue Penguin. :D Great story! I liked it alot.

Oh no, I vanished. Well, shit, there goes the neighborhood. [img]tongue.gif[/img]

Finaly...
I haven't been able to get on IW for weeks now:(
But I'll continue the story at once:) If there are still people around who'd like to see it finished?

Absolutely [img]graemlins/thumbsup.gif[/img] I look forward to the next episode.

It is a time of peace, after the defeat of the Evil Cat Overlord Choc; the slow process of rebuilding Ironworks started.
But… some of dark powers remained on Ironworks and at the edge of the forgotten Dungeon Siege board a group of evil cat clones gathered for a fiendish ritual!

50 years ago
Hillary: C’mon Mr Snuggles, the master is waiting.
Snuggy: That is Dr. Snuggles for you, I didn’t spend the best years of my live on the evil cat academy for nothing!
Seven: Bah, you two are idiots. A disgrace to the master. I’ll resurrect him, let me see that book.
Hillary: Go on then, cast the spell.
Seven: Well…uh…I’m just a cat. I can’t read.
Hillary: Me neither!
Snuggy: Give it to me already, I went to college.
Snuggy: Are we ready to sacrifice the virgin?
Hillary: I don’t know. Seven, did you manage to find a virgin?
Seven: It was easy enough. I just kidnapped George Bush jr.
Snuggy: We can’t sacrifice Bush you idiot! We are the bad guys!
Hillary: Right, couldn’t you find a good aligned virgin?
Seven: We’ll just sacrifice this sheep then…
Snuggy: Good, let me begin the incantations.

Meanwhile, Choc is tasting the fruits of defeat.

Choc: Huh? What happened? Where am I?
Choc: Hmm, its hot and sticky in here. And it smells like someone just died.
Choc: Can it be? I am back in Dans bedroom!
Bill Gates: Actually, you are in hell. I am your roommate.
Choc: What?
BG: Hard to believe huh? This section of hell is reserved for the most evil master minds the earth has ever known. Oh, look at the time, want to go have tea with Hitler?
Choc: Noooooooo

*Loudspeaker: Attention, attention, this is your host speaking.

Bill Gates: That’s Satan, probably thought up some new torment for us.

*Loudspeaker: Will everyone please proceed to the main hall.
Murders, rapists and lawyers, please line up for the electric chair. Thieves, stalkers and Cat Overlords are requested to proceed to the guillotine.

Choc: This is horrible!
BG: Tell me about it. The big S. really seems to hate me. Hell, every Microsoft user hates me.

*Loudspeaker: What?! No, there is no toilet here! You must be new… [Horrible screaming]
*Loudspeaker: Welcome to hell.

Choc: Wait.. I feel light all of the sudden. Like I am being…

Seven: Teleported away.
Hillary: Welcome back master.
Choc: Raaaaggghhh
Snuggy: Its alive! ALIVE!
Snuggy: I always wanted to say that.
Choc: Rargh, its good to be back. Now lets return to my own message board.

At the same time….

Dizzy: AAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHH! Who has taken my disk? My favourite game. My precious!!!
Yorick: *Running. Hmm, this strange creature is gaining on me…. Maybe I can use this strange disk to make me invincible. *Inserts it in his disk drive.
Dizzy: Raaaah! You can’t hide from me. I will find it. You have stolen my precious.
Yorick:*Runs out of the cave right into a group of short sized posters.
Mouse: Where have you been Yorick? You promised you would help defeat the evil Dragon that has taken over my board. But all you do is play with the locals!
Yorick: Sorry Mouse, but look at this ancient disk I eh.. found.
Mouse: By the mods! This disk has the logo of Microsoft on it!
Yorick: Microsoft?
Mouse: An ancient evil that once ruled the international market. Ziroc can tell you more about it.
Yorick: No reason for more delay, lets just go.

Present day
At the very last page of the General Discussion there is a small thread, inhabited by a small race, known under the names space wasters, inactives and hobbits.
They detest posting, gaming and every other kind of adventure. They mostly spend their days smoking their pipes, enjoying life and lurking in posts.

I’m afraid I must stop here, due to the fact that I still don’t have a suitable Frodo, I will continue as fast as possible

[ 08-05-2002, 09:17 AM: Message edited by: Dreamer128 ]

LOL, so you're off again, Velkyn! Excellent as always.

LOL, hilarous. good work!. heh, can I be in it? pretty please? I wanna slay a dragon... or at least lead a group. lol, some things never change... my wanting to kill a dragon is one of em. [img]tongue.gif[/img]

Is there any specific character you want to play? I think the part of Legolas is still open:)

yay, any elf is good.

Is Frodo still open?

We have requirement more brains the of. Brains... err... *whistles innocently* Quite nicely done! Highly humorous [img]smile.gif[/img] There's bound to be space for RaBid Fruit trees in there somewhere... [img]tongue.gif[/img]